How could a seven-year-old who heard that several times a day every day love or even believe in God?
I'm sorry you raised that way, but that does not reflect the entirety of Catholic teaching--not by a long shot. Now that you are not 7 years old anymore, maybe you should take a look at what the Church really teaches:
A mere technicality and the out every Catholic uses when confronted with what people learn from Catholicism./ Technicality about RCC teaching is meaningless unless it's translated into action.
Veto!'s experience is hardly unusual and the Catholic church is just as guilty between the priests and nuns telling you the same thing, being threatened constantly that if you don't do X, Y, And Z you're going to go to hell anyways, no matter how many other Catholic hoops you've jumped through, and at the very best, the most you can hope for is an extended stay in purgatory to burn for an undetermined amount of time. And then when you've suffered enough, you'll be allowed to get to heaven, hopefully.
Some loving God Catholicism presents.
BTW, works and hoop jumping to get and stay saved is NOT mercy nor grace. Both are undeserved, given freely by the giver, not earned or *merited* (another word for earned) by the recipient.