If He was a typical temperamental artist,he was likely given over to moods and outbursts no doubt. Artists feel things passionately, and try to get those feelings on paper, canvas, in stone. Metal, etc, 5he problem comes with the artists being too critical of their own work, some feel, failures, or that they don’t stack up against other artists, or that they can’t get out of their heads, onto the medium, the feelings they wish to portray. Many artists will tell folks their gift is a curse, because it wo t let them create what they thi k they should be able to, but they can’t stop,from trying, over and over and over. It drives them.
There was an artist, Matisse I think? Who had created great paintings, but was never “finished with them and woild,would, disgusted and throw them In The fire and destroy them. Folks who saw them couldn’t understand why, because to them they looked fantastic, but to him they were reminders that he couldn’t quite achieve what he set out to.
It really is a kind of curse. I will do a portrait, and see an area of the face, or hand or whatever, and something just seems off to me, but I can’t quite put my finger on what it is, and will,try all kinds of things to “correct the area”, think I’ve got it at 2 am in the morning, get up the next day, and it looks worse than when I tried to “correct it”. Others will look at it and think it looks OK, but I’m just not satisfied. I can see the I perfections, the off color, the wrong tone, shade, light, perspective, etc. I love trying to create, but hate it at the same time. I usually just walk away fro a painting when the agonizing over it becomes too much, and never finish it
I strongly advise against taking up golf, Bob.
I hear you!
As well as a musician, I too am an artist (mostly acrylics) so I understand exactly what you’re saying.
Of course, I’ve never murdered anyone.
Even “allegedly”, LOL.