OK:
My testimony (and rather than using my slow stiff arthritic typo fingers I'm mainly using dictation box speech-to-text software available on the Chrome browser - even though I prefer Firefox - although I have to do some editing afterwards) of conversion is that of one raised in a strict devout Irish Catholic household in a predominate Catholic area in MA. Two of my uncles we're Catholic priests overseas, and as a family we never missed Mass or a holy day of obligation, etc I was/am the middle of five children and along with my two brothers I was an altar boy.
My dad sometimes served as an usher (and they took the 25 cent "seat money") and who was a very honest man of conscience as was my mother who was part of the Sodality. One time my mom told me that my dad was called upon to give an introduction to a speaker for a Holy Name society meeting, and had trouble providing an honest introduction. For he could not say, "it gives me great pleasure who introduce..." since it did not give him great pleasure. I forget what he came up with. But anyway that type of strict and conscientious upbringing resulted in me chafing at the yoke in my later years as a teenager and finally leaving home. I had started working at a local dairy farm at age 14 (dad said I was either going to get a job or work around the home property. I chose what I thought would be the easier alternative). After graduating from H.S. I also worked as a manager for gas station for a while and in the pool cleaning business.
After leaving home where I was paying rent I soon became part of a group of a number of guys around my age renting the "white house" next to the dairy. Later I was invited to become part of a group of four of the relatively more stable guys who rented another house in a nearby city, three of whom were in a rock band (we were also Star Trek devotees). At the dairy where I worked I had started working processing milk as well as making truck deliveries. This was all in the early 1970s. My life in this era was basically work and partying, drinking , smoking weed (almost perpetually) and seeking sex with women, and occasionally doing drugs. To a large part this life was a means of escaping or subduing conscience. However, after about 6 years of all this I became depressed, which was not normal for me, and although no one had spoken to me about salvation I knew that my problem was sin separating me from God, and I felt that I was as one on train tracks with the judgement train coming, and that I needed to get right with God.
Because of my upbringing and with my parents being those of integrity, I understood that asking God for forgiveness meant a change of life, in this case a permanent life repentance. I knew this would be quite radical and I did not feel ready for it especially since I was due to go to a wedding in a few months and I knew I would get drunk. I therefore entered into period of reformation in which I would stop or tone down my drinking etc. and sneak (lest my party bodies made fun of me) out to Mass mornings but not go to communion for I knew that that was wrong. My plan was that after this wedding then the coast would be clear to go to Confession and formally repent and obtain forgiveness. Note that at this time I knew nothing much more than Catholic teaching. And so that is what I did. I think that it was in October 1977 that I went to Confession at St Thomas Church with a priest who was a former drill sergeant. I tearfully confessed that I was away from God and the church and was repenting of my former life. He told me that took great courage and gave me some prayers to say and I went home.
Now my dad had reverenced the Bible hand occasionally read it and I knew it was the word of God - which is why I had not wanted to read it. But now I knew I needed to get a Bible, and so I went to the large Ann and Hope department store and look at the Bible's and pick the one with the most colorful cover which turned out to be the living Bible (I later felt it was a watered-down translation). Note that although I believed that was forgiven of my past life I became even more conscious my sinful nature, and sometimes would spend most of my Sunday afternoons - that being the only day I had off after working about 60 hours a week - repenting for basically having thoughts and feelings arising from my sinful nature. I also felt I needed to go to confession at least once a week even though I was living quite a straight life.
Someone also told me that there was a new Christian station that had just begun in the area, and so I began listening to it and which fed my hungry soul. And because I was repentant and wanted to please God then when I heard that salvation was by grace, and not by any merit of works that I had done or could do then I immediately told God (even if it meant pulling my truck over) that I trusted Jesus Christ for my salvation and not anything that I had to offer.
Sometime around this time I realized an inner change taken place in me. I'd become the main route driver for the dairy, delivering milk and ice cream, and would be driving down the highway and noticed that even nature seemed new to me, even though I was raised in a rural area. I also now saw woman as unique creations of God to be appreciated for what they were and not for their anatomy (although that certainly can be appreciated). I was also very eager to help people and was voted the most helpful employee at my work at this time, and I felt I could not think evil of anybody, and also felt much indebtedness to any who helped me. No, I sadly cannot say this innocence and constant goodwill etc. remained continuous (it is said there was only 11 days journey into the Promised Land if one stayed on the straight and narrow and overcame all obstacles), yet I had a definite conversion and experienced profound changes in heart and life. And rather that morbid introspection I started realizing I needed to thank God for what he had done for me such as in making me a "new creation in Christ Jesus," "accepted in the Beloved" " bought with a price."
I wanted to serve God yet I was still in the Catholic Church making every single Mass and holy day of obligation, and I also volunteered as a lector and served as a CCD teacher. However, I was different and after mass I would sometimes be sincerely telling others about salvation that I had experienced, yet with rare exceptions no other Catholics we're interested. My mother told me they considered it to be boring and my parents basically opposed it although they overall saw my conversion as a good thing. I also began to attend Catholic Charismatic meetings which is where I mainly met the few Catholics I found who were interested in the Bible and talking about the things of God .
And apart from church I was also telling others about Jesus and the need for salvation, and most of them were Catholic themselves if not practicing ones. I also even felt God wanted me to go on the highway and warn people not to go in the strip clubs but to repent, which I did many times, even after working till late at night, for this was all by myself while I was working at least 60 hours a week Much of this, as much as was of God, was to help me to trust in the Lord, to walk by faith even without much fellowship. However I did want and sought seek the latter, which is partly why I went to the charismatic meetings.
Now by this time I had known about other churches in other places that were what called born again churches, but even though I am sure I would have went to churches of ministers I heard on the radio like John MacArthur, Chuck Swindoll, Vernon McGee, Chuck Smith , etc yet I was not willing to trust the local ones.
Yet by this time I had known from the Bible that some of what the Catholic church was teaching was not that of the New Testament Church, and so about 6 years after my repentance and conversion then I humbly sincerely prayed to God (in the parking lot of where I worked) that if it was his will for me to leave the Catholic Church and go to a different one then I trusted that he would show me. and which He promptly did.
The next night going to the store where I worked I found an old friend of my dad's who sometimes did mechanical work for him. He was a senior citizen not only in age but also in height, and when I told him something about his need for God then he loudly proclaimed he believed in God and told me about a church down hand off the highway that he went to. and which is what resulted in my leaving the Catholic Church and into Evangelical Fellowship about 1983 and far more service, by the grace of God, thanks be Him.
However, this is not the end of the journey, or of only forward motion in sanctification or of repentance and seeking more, which continues, but only God deserves credit for salvation and for anything good done thru me, while the only things I can and must take credit for are my too-often failures in the full obedience of faith.
Wherefore, my beloved, as ye have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling. For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure. (Philippians 2:12-13)
Only a man without experience could imagine that farm labor was easier than home chores! I'm sure you learned quickly!
(Still reading!)
Amen! The gospel!
(Still reading!)
Hallelujah! Yes!
(Still reading!)
So, so true!
But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us (2 Corinthians 4:7).
2 Timothy 2:20 A large house contains not only vessels of gold and silver, but also of wood and clay. Some indeed are for honorable use, but others are for common use. 21 So if anyone cleanses himself of what is unfit, he will be a vessel for honor: sanctified, useful to the Master, and prepared for every good work. 22 Flee from youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, together with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.
Thank you SO MUCH for sharing your detailed and very moving testimony of salvation and deliverance!