Comforting, that.
>>So then, nothing really matters, as you said.
Everything matters. If you seek after God, then God chose you. Your theology does not matter to him. Only HIS theology matters to him.
>>Comforting, that.
It should be, but I sense that you want to be the master of your destiny and you feel that God needs to obey your wishes to choose him and then he needs to reward you for your efforts, even though he told you that they are sewage to him. Take comfort in the fact that God is a better God than you are, even though you hate that.