“You are neglecting the Orthodox and Coptics
No, I considered them
“The idea of a practicing Christian not confessing and seeking absolution is a fairly modern innovation
No, the Scriptures were written 2,000 years ago.
“I don’t recall the Bible saying anywhere “go tell God in secret about what you think your sins are and all will be forgiven.”
No need to. Christians have direct access to God for forgiveness.
“On the contrary the Bible gives the apostles, and by extension their successors, the power to bind and to loose.”
No, if you read Greek, it does not say that - nor that there is succession of this.