I don’t know what LCMS you’re talking about.
The one that I’m part of bears very little resemblance to the boogeyman that you’re waving around.
What denomination are you?
It's the one whose schools indoctrinated children to regurgitate from some of Martin Luther's writings for an hour every morning.... while hiding other things he wrote that they didn't want to deal with.
It's the one who has ICONified the drunken anti-Semite in celebration of the Reformation.
That one.