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Thank you. I have actually started a sort-of book. I kept a log for the first several weeks. I had about a dozen pages, but my computer was attacked by someone who wanted money to unlock my files, so I lost it.
But I did manage to save the first few pages.

Learning to be Generous
5/15/17
It is the second week of Lent, and I have done nothing about it. There was a time when taking Lent seriously was very important to me, but that seemed to end last year. I think it may have to do with putting time limits on God: “Just keep this for forty days . . . then you can go back to normal.” I know that’s not the intent of Lent, but that is what it was beginning to feel like for me. That, and my natural tendency toward living like a Pharisee – counting days and measuring quantities. I complaint about this to God a couple of weeks before last year’s Lent, and He agreed: “Just start right now,” He said.

“Two weeks before Lent even begins?” I complained. “And how long would this last if I start early?”

“I thought you wanted to get away from counting – but don’t worry – I’ll let you know when you can stop.” And he did – a week before Easter. So I went an extra week.

I know – I asked for it.

So this year I’m two weeks into Lent, and nothing – until now. This year He says, “What would you do if I gave you $100 a week to give away?”

“Who would I give it to? – how would I know it was OK? – and just how long does this go on?” See, I told you my natural inclination is sympathetic toward Pharisee tendencies.

God said, “None of that is the point – I want to teach you about generosity – just letting money flow through your fingers. Who you give it to and why is not even important. Just give it all away every week.”

“I AM generous – did you see what I offered in the big fundraising at church?” I retorted.
“But that is not the same – writing checks is not handing out money. I want this to be personal.” I was still confused.
“And how will you give me this money?” I was getting practical again, but I had already guessed the answer.

“Look in your wallet and you will see that you have $100, and it will be there every week.” I knew it – we were talking about MY money. And that’s when it hit me. That is exactly the kind of thinking I needed to work on. None of it was mine, and I had to learn to treat it like God’s money for a change. Or at least that’s what I though the message was going to be.

So I started this journal so you could come along with me in this adventure. I have no idea how this is going to turn out. But I am starting with $100 in my wallet.

“Taking” with God?

I think I need to take a few minutes to describe what I mean when I have a “conversation” with God. Otherwise, you may decide that I am crazy or, worse yet, far more Spiritual than is warranted.

It always amazes me how ready we are to give the devil credit for influencing us: “The devil made me do it,” or “the devil made me say that.” And it is often the truth. We are all under the influence of the spiritual world, but just quicker to give the devil the credit than God the credit. With just a little practice, we can distinguish between “my” ideas, the devil’s ideas, and God’s ideas.

I suspect part of the problem is that we consider ourselves “basically good”, so bad ideas must come to us from outside. Good ideas, on the other hand, could certainly come from such a good person as “I” am. We would be much closer to the truth if these two positions were reversed.

God’s voice never contradicts His word, never causes injury, always lifts up.

The “voice” I hear is my own – but the ideas are God’s. I can usually tell because it is often something that would never occur to me – and I can ask questions and get answers. It almost always happens within the context of prayer.
This is a good example. I was in prayer asking about Lent, and this “thought” came out of the blue. I have never heard of anyone doing this and had no basis for the idea. It is, of course, fully supported by scripture: everything is God’s, and we are to look out for our neighbors. And that’s how this whole crazy thing got started. What’s next? The $100 is counted out and in my pocket – we shall see . . .

Getting Started

I saw her right away. She was at Walmart, very pregnant, and her husband was right behind her. They looked happy. I remembered what it was like to be young, expecting, and broke – I wanted to give them some of God’s money – but I froze – then it was too late. This was going to be harder than I expected! But why? I needed a plan. I needed to decide ahead of time what I was going to say, so I could be ready. When the moment strikes, there really isn’t much time.

The next day I was ready – Twice! We were standing in line to get our car license plates renewed and – just like before – she was pregnant – but this time her husband was holding their daughter in his arms. They were laughing. They accepted God’s money with joy and thanksgiving – I could not think of a better way to start!

The second was a harried woman with two toddlers walking into Walmart. She looked tired. I said, “You look like you have your hands full,” then offered her some of God’s money. She tried to say no (as a matter of fact, she did say no), but I told her God loved her and wanted her to have this money. Then I was gone.

I wondered if it was OK to give the money to her.
“It does not matter who you give it to or why – the important thing is that you find someone – anyone for any reason – and give the money away.”

Week Two

Time to look in my wallet and see if another $100 is in there – it was.

I took to putting “God’s give-away money” in my left pocket, so my “right hand would not know what my left hand was doing.” I carry it with me wherever I go.

I was at a Walk for Life event and thought this would be a really good place to put some of God’s money. But before I could finish the thought God said, “No! – I can find plenty of money for them – this has to go from your hand to someone else’s hand. Besides, if you give it to an organization some of the credit will fall to you.” Obviously, I still had a lot to learn.

Once again, I was at Walmart (spending WAY too much time there!). I was pulling into my parking space as they were getting into their pickup truck. She was pregnant and he was helping her shop. They were laughing.

“I remember what it was like starting a family – never enough to go around.” This was my introduction. “God loves you and would like for you to have this extra money.”
I have never seen such unexpected Joy. The husband had just gotten into the truck. He got out, came around to my side, and said, “I just want to shake your hand.” He was beaming as we shook hands. Those few seconds remained with me the rest of the day. It is wonderful just thinking about the stories they will share with their friends. This is really getting good.

I was starting to notice something I never expected. I was looking at everyone differently. For starters, I was LOOKING at them, questioning in my mind, “What could they need that I could provide?” It was like my whole relationship, my whole basis of contact with the world was changing. And it had not even been two weeks! I could never have imagined!