Thank you very much for posting this. As the Quakers say, it "speaks t my condition" and helps enlighten and explain some of the stuff going on in my life right now. Trouble. You have evidently gotten a triple dose of it. And it brings to mind something St. Ignatius of Loyola said to a struggling friend: "If God is permitting very great suffering in your life, it is certain He is making you into a very great saint."
I can only say I will pray for you with my 2 cents worth of prayer. But added to Christ's suffering ---- well, He will make it inexplicably fruitful, though we don't know how.
I am more than touched by the grin-inducing description of the joy you have found with your laughing wife through all these seasons of pain, disability and loss.
Jesus is doing something with you. Just stay in His grip. And, if I may ask, please pray for me.
Hi Mrs. Don-o,
This is a part that was edited out:
“Not long after I got out of the rehab hospital, I still needed a lot of help. One day she was helping me get dressed, and I made a simple comment. “You know, you’re just like all the female staff at the rehab hospital. They just don’t realize it’s possible to pull up your pants too far when you’re a guy.” My poor wife is a teacher. She protested loudly that I should know she has no medical training and that she had no way of knowing these things. I retorted that women who did this for a living obviously must not know either! Then after a moment, we started laughing uncontrollably. It became a running joke, something she shared with others in her mothers’ group, and something that inevitably she’d use to get me laughing again, quite often, when the need arose. For some odd reason, it seemed to come up when I was already standing, and laughing uncontrollably took away all my strength and balance when I could least afford it, so I had to hold on to her more than ever.”
I found out for the first time a month ago that in addition to other concerns I have pulmonary hypertension. It has about a 50% mortality rate within 1 to 5 years, and 75%-80% or more within 10 years. Its always fatal eventually. It can be slowed down in some cases by rigid diet and exercise, so I’ve lost 60lbs and I’m trying to figure out something I can do that I’ll stick to. (There is some good news - there weren’t any treatments available 25 years ago, but Cialis and Viagra were first patented for the treatment of pulmonary hypertension.)
I’m honestly not upset about the diagnosis and prognosis. I know it sounds odd, but when we lost my receptionist and friend to cancer a couple years ago, I remarked that I sort of envied those with knowledge of when their time was up. It seemed easier to be ready knowing that “the end” (of this life) is definitely coming within a certain time frame.
I’m just upset because I thought I was having such a remarkable recovery from the strokes and that if I kept working hard enough, I’d have this thing beat and I’d be able to return to some form of “making a living.”
But the thought of leaving my dear saintly wife alone, some day, sooner than I thought, is very hard. And with our oldest son being so far away in the Norbertines in Silverado CA, I don’t know how she’s going to be able to see him more often.
Anyway I guess all this is just the next step along the way ...
I’m going to be a guest on EWTN Radio this Saturday from 3:00 to 4:00pm EST on Barbara McGuigan’s show.
I’ve been a guest on her radio show several times a number of years ago when I was still chairman of a small Prolife healthcare group, talking about our opposition to euthanasia, physician assisted suicide, the HHS mandate and the deadly time bombs in ObamaCare.
She has read my recent article at OnePeterFive.com, and wants me to talk about the content of that article, i.e., the recent strokes, my recovery, redemptive suffering and abandonment to Divine Providence.
It’s one thing to discuss Prolife issues as it relates to healthcare. It another thing altogether to talk about personal issues, but I think God wants this tale told. Please say a prayer for this specific intention.
Thanks,
Brian