We VENERATE Mary and the saints. We ADORE God.
Prayer is a way of communication with God or the saints. As least that is the Catholic definition. What some people may THINK Catholics are doing is a different story. Look it up; that is what prayer is: communication with God and the saints.
I pray to my patron saint, St. Anne, and I pray to Mary to ask them to intercede for me, us, whomever. It's simple COMMUNICATION, nothing more. Sometimes I THANK them too.
Mary has NEVER, ever turned me down for what I have asked for. I've only done it a couple of times in my entire life...for something I REALLY, REALLY wanted.
I’m sorry your husband is gone, I lost a great grandfather not long ago, it’s not the same as a husband obviously, but I loved him very much. I’ll see him one day again.
The trouble with your definition of prayer is that it’s not biblical. Praying for one who’s gone won’t have an affect, whatever has happened has already happened. We need to focus our efforts on praying for the living that they may be saved.