I don’t think it’s as simple as saying if predestination is true then humans can’t freely love and are only like robots. Instead, I look it at as God removing the spiritual blinders from some in order for them to be able to freely believe. The hard part is understanding why God doesn’t remove the spiritual blinders from everyone so that all can eventually be drawn to Him.
It seems to go against our human understanding of fairness that God would harden hearts like He did to Pharaoh, but Romans 9:14-23 shows that we can’t argue against God’s designs.
Sure, God's design is that we are all born and we all die. Others may influence or determine the timing of our births and our deaths, but what happens in between and afterwords is based upon our acceptance of Grace freely given, not imposed.