Point is that it was taught to us AS IF IT WERE DOCTRINE..
Then you acknowledge that you were poorly Catechized?
Oh, I entirely get that.
As I've been saying, and it's no fault of yours, there was some sloppy catechesis going on.
I have libraries (ok, small libraries, very small) of examples of lousy catechesis. I was a big noise in kiddie religious edumication for a couple of years. and I was horrified.
What should be THE GOAL of kiddie religious ed? Why, it seems to me, to proclaim that saving love of God in Christ Jesus, what else? If I myself trust God and the power of His love, even if/though I think the feelthy papist Church is the bees knees, I am going to try to proclaim His love the best I can, in word and deed, and one of the 'deeds' will be to trust Him conspicuously by not attempting to turn the Gospel into an instrument of control or of enculturation.
A fourth grader engaged me in dialogue: "Mr. Dawg, God loves me right?"
"Yes"
He want me to be happy, right?
"Yes!" [firmly]
"Then why doesn't He help me with my math homework?
To me, this was wonderful,. He was casting the question in terms of the first things, the basic principles! So I could talk about God developing our strengths and skills and character blah blah, but the kid had already put the whole thing in terms of Love.
If God wants the kid to become a Catholic, or whatever, that's wonderful. But the kid is IMHO more likely to care about God, to rely on Him, to reach for and listen for Him if he hasn't had a bunch of prune faces emotionally beating up on him while proclaiming a love they are making incredible.
But my genius and wisdom are, for some reason, unappreciated, and within and without the Catholic Church religious ed dopes keep using God to try to control children -- because the teachers have too little faith.
And as Protestants teach better than many Catholics, a lack of faith makes you stupid, and enables lousy decisions. So the next thing you know a bunch of good kids have experienced what should be (from my POV) a wonderful introduction in to the Gospel of Love as an oppressive boring experience in being made to feel guilty.
It's a crime. But fortunately God is good and can use our ferocious booboos as megaphones for His word, or I would have cried myself to sleep way too many nights.