Actually, it is one of the few things that I understand perfectly.
IMO-It is one of the most evil heresy to ever hit the Church/church. I can trace just about every heresy in the Church's/church's past or now to this evil belief. It deliberately supplants God as our rightful soveign ruler with the false belief that we control the shots. We feel we can "save" ourselves. It gives people the idea that they somehow can do "godly" things that pleases God robbing our precious Lord of the rightful glory and honor due Him for HIS work. It pollutes the believers understanding of the scriptures. I am truly sorry that I ever believed this doctrine and I will ask God's forgiveness for my foolishness until the day I die. Sorry but I think this is one of the worst heresy in the Church/church and I am very happy to speak out against this evil belief whenever I have the opportunity.
Was that clear?
Yes, it’s quite clear.
Your understanding of free will is severely defective.