Why would you not trust them? Weird Al Yankovic does...
As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain I take a look at my wife and realize she's very plain
But that's just perfect for an Amish like me You know, I shun fancy things like electricity
At 4:30 in the morning I'm milkin' cows Jebediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows... fool
And I've been milkin' and plowin' so long that Even Ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone
I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin
But if I finish all of my chores and you finish thine Then tonight we're gonna party like it's 1699
We been spending most our lives
Living in an Amish paradise
I've churned butter once or twice
Living in an Amish paradise
It's hard work and sacrifice
Living in an Amish paradise
We sell quilts at discount price
Living in an Amish paradise
...
Long-story-short: some animal rightsers known to my wife and me did in fact this evening, in an ignorant-but-conveniently-roundabout way, accuse our Amish poultry supplier of—get this—”factory farming.”
Pardon my French, but just what the bloody h*** is an Amish factory?
Well, I suppose it’s less a matter of not trusting them so much as the fact that no matter what callous lies I might spread about them online, there is likely no way that they will ever know about it or defend themselves.
It’s sort of like giving backhanded and subtly-insulting compliments to your average lib. It’s fun because you know they’ll just never catch on.