I don’t quite understand what you are expressing in this post—some clarification would be helpful.
What I do know is that as a convert to Catholicisim I have personally experienced very unpleasant hostility towards the Church I came into by choice.
Also, as a Catholic I have experienced verbal abuse outside of my church by anti-Catholic groups who were often lining the sidewalks outside the church doors, yelling hateful things to the parishoners as they either went in or came out from Mass. Some of this same group actually came into the church to create a disturbance.
I also experienced, at my workplace, discrimatory speech directed to me personally from anti-Catholic people of Protestant denominations.
When our son-in-law entered into the Catholic church after being married to our daughter for several years, he told us that one thing that impressed him was that neither my family nor my church community ever made slurs against him as a Protestant, though he had grown up hearing all sorts of untrue things about Catholicism from his parents.
Yes, this is personal and anecdotal experience I am speaking of here, and I know that it’s value is diminished simply because it is personal and anecdotal; however, I knew what our son-in-law had expereinced because it had also been my own experience growing up as a child in a mix of Calvinist and Wesleyan professions.
I have always had a profound regret and discomfort and sometimes pain with any virulent expression of disdain for another Christian denomination. It has proven counter-productive for me every time, and is not the kind of “witness” that has authentic value.
OTOH, I will happily discuss, respectfully, of course, why I do not consider myself a Catholic. I know what I believe and, most importantly, I know why I believe what I do. I can defend my faith without being hateful. In fact, I think it is hateful for anyone who disagrees with me to call me hateful, or an anti-Catholic bigot solely because I disagree with them. I don't hate anybody!
My mother is Catholic and I love her dearly. I even take her to Mass every Sunday. We often discuss faith issues and it doesn't devolve, ever. Could I do that if I was anti-Catholic? There is a huge difference and it would be great if some here could acknowledge that.