(Audio) My Advice to Catholic Parents: Don't Let Your Kids Date Non-Catholics

Patrick Madrid ^ | 11-24-09 | Patrick Madrid

[Patrick Madrid]

I know, this is hardly revolutionary or unique advice, but I was recently asked about this issue by a young Catholic man who called my "Open Line" radio show (heard every Thursday at 3:00 p.m. ET). He had been dating a devoutly Presbyterian girl, and her father didn't like it one bit that the guy was Catholic.

I think my response to his "what do I do now?" question may have surprise him. (It apparently surprised and even dismayed a few of my listeners, judging from some of the e-mails that came in after that show.)

My basic premise, which I advert to in this audio segment is that . . .

[nmh]

Would i be better if he dated Polosi’s daughter?

Pelosi is Catholic.

Or maybe a Kennedy daughter?

As for us, we only allow Bible based Christians as datable material.

[willgolfforfood]

Does your Bible based Christians list include Catholics, non-Catholics, or both? Just curious.

[FES0844]

Wise not to be “unevenly yoked.”

[Dr. Sivana]

Date? Date?! Any young man who has intentions on courting my daughters (when they are of age) better learn how to court. And yes, they must be committed Catholics, for starters.

[Patrick Madrid]

By “Catholic,” at least in this context, I mean a “practicing Catholic,” not a pick-&-choose, dissenting, Catholic in Name Only kind of “Catholic.” Nancy Pelosi and her daughter would fit the latter description, it seems to me.

[buccaneer81]

I disagree. I’m Catholic, as was my first wife. She was an adulterer and a lousy parent. My present wife is Baptist and is the best thing that ever happened to me.
Just my two cents.

[Grunthor]

That is actually really good advice, and I am a Protestant. I have told my girls as they grew up, don’t date outside your religion unless you are willing to adopt his beliefs.

[nmh]

“Does your Bible based Christians list include Catholics, non-Catholics, or both? Just curious.?

My Bible makes no reference to Catholics.

What my Bible does say, and I wouldn’t be suprised if your Bible said the same is

John.1:14

[14] And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, (and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father,) full of grace and truth.

Also,

2Tim.3:16

[16] All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:

So it goes to follow, that Bible based CHristians are the dating material for this household.

Your household doesn’t have to follow ours.

Like any other issue in life, it is a CHOICE! You see, He doesn't care what denomination you are. What He cares about is OBEDIENCE to HIS WORD as best you can be.

[OpusatFR]

Agreed! One of mine married an agnostic who we love dearly and is very slowly coming to the faith. The example we set is absolutely imperative. We live as Christians and that is the most important evangelical tool. Practice what you preach.

The others won’t date those who do not share their faith.

Every day our prayer is for strong Catholic DILs!

[Patrick Madrid]

I hear you, and I agree with you. I am using “date” here in the sense of courtship. If you read Steve Wood’s excellent book, “The ABCs of Choosing a Good Husband,” you’ll understand where I’m coming from.

“Date” is the colloquial term most people use, but “courtship” is what my wife and I allow for our children. Now, with our three oldest all happily married with children of their own, and two more children who appear to be likely to marry soon (to solidly, practicing Catholics), I can say with confidence that the time-honored Catholic policy of courtship (as opposed to what commonly is meant by “dating”) is wise and effective.

[Patrick Madrid]

Far be it from me to tell you your own business, and I am quite prepared to believe what you say about these two women.

But I think you should read my comment above about how I define "Catholic" in this particular context. Your first wife, as you have described her, would not qualify as the kind of Catholic about which I'm speaking here.

[RoadGumby]

Amen there nmh. Denominations only Really matter when you get down to brass tacks - Do the persons follow the Bible and Jesus?

All else follows from that.

[Nosterrex]

There was a time when religious affiliation was very important. Catholics married Catholics, Lutherans married Lutherans, and Reformed married Reformed. It was scandalous for someone to marry outside of their religious faith. Those days are gone. Most Christian parents are just happy that their children marry a Christian. It is not because parents are more “tolerant and enlightened,” but because religious affiliation is not important. Love trumps everything, including religion, in our society.

[wardaddy]

I often defend Catholics here from being picked on but some of ya’ll bring it on yourself bigtime.

I had never ever seen Catholic prejudice towards non Catholics till I came here at 42 ten years ago.

I don’t really care if folks are prejudiced, sometimes it’s warranted but if you do then you can’t complain if it comes back at ya.

Not hard to see how Ulster has festered for so long with this sorta get alongness.

[sticker]

There is no difference between this and the woman at my mother's church that when she found out I was dating the girl that is now my wife when she said “but she's Catholic” BIGOTS all

[Patrick Madrid]

Well, I for one really wish that those days would come back. Experience shows that mixed marriages are not wise. The last 50 years of divorce, religiously-based strife between spouses, and a few new generations of theologically confused, indifferentist Catholics are among the negative consequences when “love trumps all,” especially when it trumps common sense.

[mkjessup]

God doesn’t care what the label on the outside says, He is more concerned with the contents of the package.

[jennyjenny]

Tradition

[Patrick Madrid]

Sometimes the truth hurts. This happens to be one of those truths that provokes antagonism from some who don't want to hear it.

Speaking the truth usually brings "being picked on." That's fine. As a Catholic who respects Protestants even though I strongly disagree with some of their theological opinions, I don't subscribe to the "go along to get along" approach you seem to be advocating. And I'd bet that if you took a poll of the committed Protestants who frequent the FR religion section, they'd say the same thing.