Your description - “things worse than death” - actually makes me glad the Pope refused a feeding tube.
Stupid bloody media.
I attended a family friend’s funeral last week and talked to my husband’s cousin there about her mother. She’s 87, been very sick this summer, shuttled back and forth from nursing home to hospital. This daughter cared for her at home up until about June, when she no longer had the knowledge or ability to care for her herself. She said “We got Hospice for Mom. She’s confused, doesn’t know who I am, she’s scared and in pain. She’s being kept comfortable now and we’re not doing anything else but that. Because to do anything else would just be torturing her.”
I understand that completely. You and your siblings should make peace with the idea that your mom knew what was best for her, even though it was hard for you guys. I know...it seems like our parents will always be there, strong and guiding. She was ready though, you did nothing wrong and neither did she, for knowing it was time. Death is natural, it happens to all of us as surely as being born does.
Oops, forgot to add that yes, there are things worse than death. And watching someone in pain be tested and poked and prodded, dragged hither and yon, is hard.
I’m not Catholic but I had a great respect for the Pope. And I look at it this way - do you not think that he was delighted to meet God face to face? Do you think that perhaps one of his last conscious thoughts was about that and how ecstatically happy he was going to be upon meeting him and joining him for eternity? Going on to bigger and better things, as it were?
Your mom was probably the same way.