***I don’t get the loving part; if you have 6 children and you condemn (say) 3 of them to burn in hell forever, it doesn’t give the appearance of loving. It gives the appearance of whimsical tyrant.***
You are not a child of God UNTIL he adopts you into his family. Until then, you are just a creation of his, to do with as he wills. When you become a child of God, NOTHING will separate you from him, not even your own actions.
That's just plain contrary to what Genesis tells us. He creates every human in His image. He set mans eparate from the rets of the Creation.