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I've run a herd of 200 sheep, counting lambs. I bet you haven't. I've gotten up at 2:30 AM and gone out in the sleet and found a lamb with a core temperature so low that the rectal thermometer couldn't register it, and, by the Grace of God, I brought that lamb back to where it was bleating and pooping all over my dining room (where the wood stove I'd slid it under while I napped, after I'd injected warmed glucose and saline into its abdominal cavity so it would have enough heat to handle the colostrum I ran down a gastric tube into its little tummy, was) . I know a little something about being a pastor.

And before I ran sheep I planted and tended, on my knees, acres and acres of grapes. I wasn't an especially good laborer in the Vineyard, but I planted, tended, nurtured, tied up, pruned, and harvested in a Vineyard, so I know a little something about that as well.

I was ordained in the Episcopal Church. I labored in the Vineyard, and worked as a Pastor. I renounced my orders to become a Catholic. I "renounced", as we say, because after study of the Scriptures and prayer, I reached a conclusion which you do not find admirable.

I really am beyond caring if any human finds me admirable. I'm too tired. I know how foul I am without Christ. I know what beauty Christ offers.

The Church of Christ existed for a few centuries before it decided what was "canonical", what was the New Testament. The Church which wrestled with what belongs in the Bible which you hold against her is the Church I joined.

As a Catholic layman and a deputy, I have prayed with prisoners after I searched them invasively, after I shackled, cuffed, and chained them. I have tried to convey something of the love of God to someone who put one of my colleagues in the hospital - as we drove this particular individual to the prison where he would spend the next 20 or so years.

And all I can say is that however the Church looks from the outside, what I have found within is Jesus.

From the outside, you all talk about weird psychological unresolved issues with our Mommies to explain our devotion to Mary. You (not you personally) say things you simply cannot know (because they aren't true, and I know because I was there) about incense, tradition, and pagan rites.

But I, despite my viciousness and sins, and although I am on my knees, keep finding myself smiling because I hear the rustle of angelic wings and the shouts of triumph of the people of God, and when I look around I see some tired father holding his 8 month old baby at a Friday evening Mass and a frumpy old lady dressed completely inappropriately, for the situation or for her age -- but it is for these, the ones dragged in from the highways and byways with scarecly a clue as to what is going on, it is for these that Jesus came.

And by His grace I am permitted to be among them.

I am not admirable. I am old and fat and weak. I have more than my share of chins. But I have seen the Lord, and He is beautiful and, just the memory brings a smile to my lips.

If the choice is between Jesus and the Bible, I'm going with Jesus.

And all I can say is that however the Church looks from the outside, what I have found within is Jesus.

I am not admirable. I am old and fat and weak. I have more than my share of chins. But I have seen the Lord, and He is beautiful and, just the memory brings a smile to my lips.

If the choice is between Jesus and the Bible, I'm going with Jesus.

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Praise The Lord and pass the ammunition. I still find you admirable in your faith and praise God for it.

I hope you realize, not all folks in ANY group are as pure and God focused in their faith.

And, that each group has their group-inherent flaws which detract from; hinder and in too many cases out right prevent folks from seeing and following closely to Jesus.

I'm not very often interested in critiquing thing which are Biblical and facilitate folks being close to Jesus.

Things which hinder and get in the way between individuals and Jesus concern me a lot--in any and every group.