To love them MEANS to provide for them. Loving them also means teaching them in the ways of the Lord. The Bible is clear on this. There is no separation between these.
I agree, but the way you worded it does not reflect the above. You said God commanded you. Is 'love' a command for you?
loving them also means teaching them in the ways of the Lord
But as a Reformed you also believe that they will or will not be believers if God so predestined them to be, regardless of what you do, right?
So, whether you teach them or not, the outcome is already decided. What's the point of teaching them?