You are just too, too funny! I can't begin to imagine what it must be like to lure the brood to Mass but I have no doubt that our Lord is smiling at you and all the young ones, grinning from ear to ear.
One of the more rambunctious pre-K kids ran up to the altar during the Consecration at Mass last year. The boy stopped dead in his tracks, staring up at the host as Father lovingly shot him a glance. He got "the lecture" afterwards. Father comes from a family of 9 children. I recall one of his homilies when he used his family as an analogy. It seems the parents went to Church one night and entrusted the care of the little ones to the older kids.
Well, old or young, the name of the game is fun and they re-arranged the furniture to suit their game plan. They didn't count on the parents returning early, however. The punishment was swift. All of the children were sent to different corners of the rooms in the house, to kneel in prayer and ask forgiveness from our Lord for their misbehavior. Apparently, it left a permanent impression :-) I regret not applying the same methodology with my one and only.
Great story! I'll have to try your priest's mother's technique with my crowd, next time they pull something totally unexpected :-).