Things only people from the South know

8-27-03 | Unkown

[WKB]

Only a true Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption and that you pitch one and have the other.

Nobody but a true Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, Turnip greens, peas, beans, etc. make up a mess.

A true Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder."

A true Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is - as in "Going to town, be back directly."

Even true Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.

All true Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.

True Southerners know instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. (If the trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin').

True Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and "a right far piece." They know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20.

True Southerners both know and understand the differences between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and trailer trash. <> No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn. True Southerners know that "fixin" can be used both as a noun, verb and adverb.

A true Southerner knows how to understand Southern a booger can be a resident of the nose, a descriptive ("That ol' booger!") or something that jumps out at you in the dark and scares you to death.

True Southerners make friends standing in lines. We don't do "queues," we do "lines." And when we're in line, we talk to everybody.

Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, if only by marriage.

True Southerners never refer to one person as "ya'll."

True Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.

Every true Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that redeye gravy is also a breakfast food; that fried green tomatoes are not breakfast food.

When you ask someone how they're doing and they reply, " Fair to middlin.", you know you're in the presence of a genuine Southerner.

Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it - we do not like our tea unsweetened, "sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk.

And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 on the freeway? You say, "Bless her heart" and go on your way.

[BnBlFlag]

Well I declare!

[dixie sass]

If a southerner doesn't eat grits, well, honey, maybe thas 'cause they ain't Southern thru and thru!!!!

[Fraulein]

I'm quite serious. In fact, I only ever eat watermelon with salt, as does everyone in my family. No harm trying it just once...you might just like it!

[PurVirgo]

a real southerner know that it's soda water, or a co'cola =)

[TexasCowboy]

"...'cause Grits ain't cereal!!!!!!"

Nope! Grits are...........uh, well......grits are grits!

[dixie sass]

Yes, he was. A gentleman and a patriot.

[dixie sass]

Anyone ever had Cooter? It's pretty good especially in a soup.

[Fraulein]

"Come to the concession stand and get your ice cold soda pop, it'll make your ears go flippity flop, freeze your teeth, curl your hair, make you think your a millionaire."

LOL!

[Mo1]

OK .. I give up .. what is clabber? and what is Cooter?

[dixie sass]

Thank you for the ping Deadhead.

[PurVirgo]

I miss cheerwine... brought a whole flat of it with me when I moved to texas... sun drop too!!

[TexasCowboy]

When using that old saying, "I swan", both my mother and grandmother added an "ee" to it so it came out, "I swanee".

[dixiechick2000]

"In Texas we make it just like a pumpkin pie"

In Mississippi, we don't use the spices.

We use a lot of Eagle Brand Sweetened Condensed milk and it is sweeeeet, but fantastic!

[Mo1]

No harm trying it just once...you might just like it!

Oh Ok .. I'll try it .. but it still sounds wrong ..*L*

[dixie sass]

Only someone that went to Clemson would own a Grits Plantation!!!!! Lord, help those Upcountry people...

[dixiechick2000]

"I told her to bring him some yogurt, and he'd never know the difference.
He didn't."

Smart guy...;o)

[PurVirgo]

It makes it sweeter, for some reason.

A true southerner knows that when you pay, you get a cash ticket.

got my learnin as to what it was when I moved to TX from NC

[Fraulein]

I eat salt and black pepper on cantaloupes.

Me too. There's no other way to eat them.

[mugsy]

You forgot "cuter than a bug's ear" and "knee-high to a grasshopper."

[PurVirgo]

also, you water your garden with your hose pipe

stop at the feed'n'bag store for gossip

If someone says "now, boy, lemme tell you something", you don't stay to find out what it is