Things only people from the South know

8-27-03 | Unkown

[WKB]

Only a true Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption and that you pitch one and have the other.

Nobody but a true Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, Turnip greens, peas, beans, etc. make up a mess.

A true Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder."

A true Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is - as in "Going to town, be back directly."

Even true Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.

All true Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.

True Southerners know instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. (If the trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin').

True Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and "a right far piece." They know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20.

True Southerners both know and understand the differences between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and trailer trash. <> No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn. True Southerners know that "fixin" can be used both as a noun, verb and adverb.

A true Southerner knows how to understand Southern a booger can be a resident of the nose, a descriptive ("That ol' booger!") or something that jumps out at you in the dark and scares you to death.

True Southerners make friends standing in lines. We don't do "queues," we do "lines." And when we're in line, we talk to everybody.

Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, if only by marriage.

True Southerners never refer to one person as "ya'll."

True Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.

Every true Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that redeye gravy is also a breakfast food; that fried green tomatoes are not breakfast food.

When you ask someone how they're doing and they reply, " Fair to middlin.", you know you're in the presence of a genuine Southerner.

Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it - we do not like our tea unsweetened, "sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk.

And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 on the freeway? You say, "Bless her heart" and go on your way.

[MEG33]

Is that what's left after churning?I know I've heard it before.

[nopardons]

Missed YOU too! Thanks for asking ... yes, things are better today. :-)

[squidly]

Used to love Cheerwine when I was a kid, but when I had one a month or so ago didn't like it much at all.

[ClearBlueSky]

Cantaloupe too, and sometimes apples!

[TexasCowboy]

No, clabber is like yogurt.
It used to be simply whole raw milk that had been allowed to sour.

[dixiechick2000]

"Now, they're all just AMERICAN . That's the beauty of this country. :-)"

Beautifully said.

"N.Y.C. used to put salt on their watermellon too."

I didn't know that! While I've never done that, I know many people that do.

Now, about this sweet potato pie thing...

Did it have spices in it? Or, was it very sweet?

[TexasCowboy]

I eat salt and black pepper on cantaloupes.

[wardaddy]

The dialect and speech patterns collectively called Southern accents are representative of older English speech (deep south coastal excepted where French and Arcadian French carry weight...the Bourbon French that I share from the Carolinas is different). Some high English. Some low Low. The Outer banks, parts of Appalachia(prone to even Elizabethan dialect) and tidewater VA are the easiest to spot.

First time I stepped foot in a Scottish inn and heard the local folk music I saw immediately an uncanny resemblance to C&W.

Suprisingly, very few "sayings" overall are young enough to have originated on this side of the pond.

[Mo1]

*L* .. well for the record, I don't like wiz either

[Mo1]

Here's a wee tidbit, for Southerners to chew upon. People, in N.Y.C. used to put salt on their watermellon too

Salt on watermellon ??? ... That is just wrong

BTW .. how's things going?

[dixiechick2000]

Hi, Tex!

"Did y'all have clabber?"

My Grandmama and my Grandma used clabber...at least I remember them talking about it.

[Fraulein]

Salt on watermelon is fantastic. You might want to try it sometime, just once.

[BnBlFlag]

After a hard rain, my Dad would refer to it as a "gully washer".

[TexasCowboy]

"Now, about this sweet potato pie thing..."

In the old days in the South sweet potato pie was called sweet potato pone.
In Texas we make it just like a pumpkin pie, and it tastes quite a bit the same.

[Mo1]

Salt on watermelon is fantastic

Really?? or are you just pulling my leg

[WKB]

After a hard rain, my Dad would refer to it as a "gully washer".

How about " a cow Pi**ing on a flat rock"

[dixie sass]

MH, that just means that you have "southern" in your background - your Momma's side most likely.

[TexasCowboy]

I was in a restaurant in Ballinger, Texas, when an old man sitting in a booth told the waitress in a loud voice that he wanted some "damn clabber"!
She was completely baffled!
I told her to bring him some yogurt, and he'd never know the difference.
He didn't.

[dixie sass]

Cheese is alright for a snack or dinner and occasionally breakfast - just NEVER, EVER, under penalty of death apply sugar and milk 'cause Grits ain't cereal!!!!!!

[etcb]

I remember both terms being used together as when the announcer at our baseball games used to say:

"Come to the concession stand and get your ice cold soda pop, it'll make your ears go flippity flop, freeze your teeth, curl your hair, make you think your a millionaire.

On a 90+ degree day, he was pert near right.