Things only people from the South know

Only a true Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption and that you pitch one and have the other.

Nobody but a true Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, Turnip greens, peas, beans, etc. make up a mess.

A true Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder."

A true Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is - as in "Going to town, be back directly."

Even true Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.

All true Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.

True Southerners know instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. (If the trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin').

True Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and "a right far piece." They know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20.

True Southerners both know and understand the differences between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and trailer trash. <> No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn. True Southerners know that "fixin" can be used both as a noun, verb and adverb.

A true Southerner knows how to understand Southern a booger can be a resident of the nose, a descriptive ("That ol' booger!") or something that jumps out at you in the dark and scares you to death.

True Southerners make friends standing in lines. We don't do "queues," we do "lines." And when we're in line, we talk to everybody.

Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, if only by marriage.

Every true Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that redeye gravy is also a breakfast food; that fried green tomatoes are not breakfast food.

When you ask someone how they're doing and they reply, " Fair to middlin.", you know you're in the presence of a genuine Southerner.

Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it - we do not like our tea unsweetened, "sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk.

And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 on the freeway? You say, "Bless her heart" and go on your way.

Pokeweed is a large, perennial native plant that grows up to eight feet tall. The leaves are large, simple alternate, with large stems. When the plant ages, the stems and leaf veins become red tinged. At maturity, the drooping white flowers turn into shiny purple or black berries.

Warning: Berries, roots, and mature plants are considered poisonous, therefore, are best used as new, young growth. Also, any red-tinged plant material should be discarded. To avoid possible collecting of part of the toxic root, do not cut below ground level. Pokeweed was one the first plants I discovered when I began to learn how to forage off the land.

Pokeweed is found throughout the United States in disturbed soils, often along road sides and at the edge of woods. Its species is Phytolacca americana and is called by several names to include inkberry, poke sallet, pigeonberry and pokeberry. It is a perennial and grows 6-8 feet tall with a greenish, white flower color and blooms in the summer.

Pokeweed's shoots are found during the spring around the old pokeweed stalks. Tender young shoots less than eight inches tall can be peeled, parboiled in two changes of water several minutes each, boiled in a third water until tender and served like asparagus. The poisonous roots can be gathered after frost, cut into six inch lengths and planted in sandy dirt in a heated space. They will provide shoots for several months.

The stalks are used during the spring. Young stalks before one foot tall, with leaves removed and before red tinged, can be cut and rolled in corn meal and fried like okra. They can also be pickled.

Young leaves are gathered during the spring, taken from stalks less than one foot tall. When parboiled in two changes of water of several minutes each and boiled in a third water until tender, they are good, especially with added butter, vinegar and bacon bits. Another favorite method is to add slices of hard boiled eggs or to scramble several eggs with the greens and sprinkle with vinegar. A large quantity should be gathered because pokeweed does lose bulk during cooking. To freeze, parboil leaves twice, cool, pat dry, and place them in plastic bags.

Most are amazed at the versatility of wild edibles. Others will remember those days walking in the fields with a grandparent looking for their special spot to pick a preferred wild food. One bit of warning is important, perhaps, here: Avid foraging fans aren't the safest drivers! One of my biggest problems is balancing driving safety with watching for roadside plants. Keep things in perspective as you enjoy a new experience and a beneficial hobby.

The above information was condensed from Ken Larsen's book God's Free Harvest - Successful Harvesting of Nature's Free Wild Foods.

Does anyone here know about cushaw? It's a large crook-necked, gourd-shaped squash, green and white striped with a creamy butternut-like interior.

Mamma used to take a cushaw, cut it in half lengthwise, scoop out the seeds, and chunk up the flesh. Then, I think she would boil it till it was soft, mash it with cinnamon and spices and milk and butter, and stick it in the oven on low heat for a while.

Oh, our house would smell so good! Almost as good as Thanksgiving and Christmas, but in the summer, when nobody wanted to heat up the kitchen, it was wonderful to walk up the sidewalk and smell that coming out the screen door. I hated squash, but I loved it when she made cushaw.

Is cushaw strictly South-Central Texas? Anybody else know about this squash?

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