[Buggman]

Hmph. That reminds me of an issue of Captain Marvel where the main character tortures an alien woman into submission by playing Korn . . . but forcing someone to listen to Barney? Doesn't that violate the Geneva Convention or something?

[Incorrigible]

OMG!!!!  My life is torture!!!!!!!

When I'm in my minivan by myself, the custom stereo system cranks Metalica and more.

When the kids are in the van with me, it's nothing but Sesame Street, Disney theme songs and the like.

Maybe I should take these guys for a ride in my minivan for a few days.

[mylife]

I Believe it!!!
Barney almost sent me over the edge!!

[Luke Skyfreeper]

I love you, you love me, we're a happy fam-i-leeeeeeee

AAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

[lilylangtree]

Having to listen to Metallica or any other heavy-metal music would normally be cruel and unusual punishment. However, since it's the Saddam's Iraqis, it's not so cruel or unusual after all.

[Taffini]

If they really want to break them and fast they should try "It's a Small World". Probably the worst song ever written or sung.

[ChemistCat]

Make 'em watch DORA THE EXPLORER till they crack. It won't take a full 6 hours.

[Contra]

Force them to watch Mr. Rodgers all day and plaster the walls with pictures of Helen Thomas. Well, they may find Helen Thomas attractive, so maybe not that one. Playing "Feelings" over and over would also have them ready to commit suicide.

[LibKill]

Metallica won't work on me, I like it.

But Barney? OK I'll confess now and spare you the trouble of turning it on.

[niteowl77]

Strap 'em in front of a tape from any Tony Awards show, and within an hour they'll be willing to tell you who kidnapped Lindbergh's baby and where to find Jimmy Hoffa.

[Poohbah]

OK, more torture candidates:

Barry Manilow's "I Write the Songs"

Hell, anything by Barry Manilow

Shiny Happy People by REM ("OK, pull this bus off of the Pretentiousness Turnpike! I want the shiny people over here, the happy people go over there, I'm with the angry, gun-toting, meat-eating people!" -- Denis Leary)

Any other nominations?

[gitmo]

I Love You
You Love Me
We're a Happy Family ...

[Arpege92]

They should have used something from the Dixie Chicks....I know I can't stand it when someone is whining!!!

[Reaganesque]

In the movie "Back to the Future", didn't Marty McFly use this trick on his father? You know, the scene where he dresses up in his radiation suit and says he is "Darth Vader from the planet Vulcan" and that if his father doesn't ask his mother out to the prom that he would melt his brain with Van Halen music. Worked for him.

But, I have to agree, the Barney music is definitely up there with thumb screws and bamboo under the finger nails.

[Dan from Michigan]

They don't like metal? Black album Metallica isn't nothin. Give them the OLD Metallica. Or Iron Maiden. Or Slayer. Or give them live Ted Nugent...make sure they hear Tedly yapping before the songs...

[nutmeg]

.

[GreyWolf]

“Trust me, it works,” says one U.S. operative.

I'll bet it does! It would sure as hell work on me. I would be screaming and singing like a canary after about 15 minutes of The Barney Song. Of course that brand of torture goes well beyond pulling out fingernails and electro-shock techniques, so it's not for the weak stomached observers.

[jriemer]

Hell, The Cult of the Viking Kitties have been using Led Zeppelin's Immigrant Song to pound Trolls in to submission for years...

Valhalla, I am coming!

[4mycountry]

My nomination:
(I don't know the name so here are the words)

I'm too sexy for my shirt!
Too sexy for my shirt!
So sexy that it hurts!


Everytime I hear that song I cry laughing....

[4mycountry]

My family just came up with a good one:

Oh I wish I was an Oscar Meyer weiner!
That is what I really want to be!
'Cause if I was an Oscar Meyer weiner!
Eneryone would be in love with meeee!