If you need someone to Klingon... (Help Wanted: One Klingon Interpreter)

The (Portland) Oregonian ^ | 5.10.03 | STEVE WOODWARD

[mhking]

If you need someone to Klingon. . .

05/10/03

STEVE WOODWARD

Multnomah County is looking for a Klingon interpreter -- just in case.

The county doesn't expect to be invaded by the alien warriors from "Star Trek" movies and TV series. But the office that treats county mental health patients wants to be prepared in case a client arrives in an emergency room gabbing in the galactic language.

"We have to provide information in all the languages our clients speak," says Jerry Jelusich, a procurement specialist for the county Department of Human Services, which serves some 60,000 mental health clients.

So if a patient speaks only Klingon, the county must respond with a Klingon interpreter. Officials have decided to include it with about 55 languages, some of which, such as Russian and Vietnamese, are widely spoken, and some, such as Dari and Tongan, are seldom spoken.

In recent years, Klingon has gone from being a fictional tongue to a complete language, with its own grammar, syntax and vocabulary. Jelusich and colleagues took note of a recent article in The Oregonian about a Portlander who sings karaoke in Klingon. Their later research satisfied them that Klingon is for real.

The county would pay a Klingon interpreter only in the unlikely case he or she was actually called into service.

"We said, 'What the heck, let's throw it in,' " Jelusich says. "It doesn't cost us any money."

The county's purchasing administrator, Franna Hathaway, greeted the request with initial skepticism. "I questioned it myself when it first came in. "

But, she adds, "There are some cases where we've had mental health patients where this was all they would speak."

Jelusich says that in reality, no patient has yet tried to communicate in Klingon. But the possibility that a patient could believe himself or herself to be a Klingon doesn't seem so far-fetched.

"I've got people who think they're Napoleon," he says.

Multnomah County Chairwoman Diane Linn could not be reached for comment. Next up: another mythical language popularized by The "Lord of the Rings" films.

"The kids," Jelusich says, "are learning to speak Elvish."

Steve Woodward: 503-294-5134; stevewoodward@news.oregonian.com

[Pyrion]

""The kids," Jelusich says, "are learning to speak Elvish.""

Sindarin, or Quenya? I'd love to know...

[Fabozz]

"Jelusich and colleagues took note of a recent article in The Oregonian about a Portlander who sings karaoke in Klingon."

"And we figured, well, we'll be seeing that person sooner or later, so we'd better get ready," said Jelusich.

[LizardQueen]

"Jelusich and colleagues took note of a recent article in The Oregonian about a Portlander who sings karaoke in Klingon."

"And we figured, well, we'll be seeing that person sooner or later, so we'd better get ready," said Jelusich.

As long as they aren't singing Klingon opera - that's enough to drive anyone mad.

LQ

[omegatoo]

He's dead, Jim.

;-{

O2

[Tijeras_Slim]

Well... more people speak Klingon than speak Esperanto.

I always wanted to speak Esperanto like a native.

[Bernard]

Perhaps this is wise - if you demand to speak only Klingon, maybe you are more likely to require mental health services, so it makes sense to have an interpreter on staff or retainer.

Probably explains why so many mental health workers are liberal - makes it easier to understand what the patient is trying to say.

[snarkpup]

Sindarin, or Quenya? I'd love to know...

For info on Tolkien's languages: www.ardalambion.com

[Pyrion]

Been there done that. I'm just wondering which language to concentrate on so I have higher chances of snagging that job. ;)

[KevinDavis]

What is Klingon for Zot?

[Bars4Bill]

Vatlh tlhIngans muH wa’ rojmab. Vatlh DIvI’S tIch vagh ah let nIQmeHS, joq wa’ ah pup Hoqra’ Qagh. Qo’noS lon vagh nobs, ach loS nIQS ghun wa’ ah pov chal. Vatlh ’Ivs Suv vagh ah QIp lotlhs. Vatlh lInDabs tIj vagh veQDujs, joq wa’ ah pIv neHmaH ngev tera’. Vagh romulusSngans jon Qo’noS.

LoS Doq chals nep vagh rojmabs. QI’tomer HIv vatlh QaQ nIQmeHS, ’ach vagh vetlhs ah jay’ ghong wa’ ah let neHmaH, ach vatlh DIvI’S ghun wa’ poj, joq vatlh ah Doch DenIbya’ Qatlhs jaH. Vagh pov jInmols jaS tIch loS pojs. Vagh may’S chu’ wa’ nIQ. Vatlh peys baH. Wa’ poj ngev vatlh ah QaQ wo’S. Vagh let verengans nom yot vatlh ah Dogh ychs. LoS nochs ba’ po’.

Qo’noS ah po’ jon vagh novs.

[Constitution Day]

Repeat after me:

STAR TREK IS FICTION.
KLINGON IS NOT A REAL LANGUAGE.

[mhking]

KLINGON IS NOT A REAL LANGUAGE.

Some folks feel other wise....[g]

[Constitution Day]

A psychologist could have a field day with this, but I guess they'd have to speak "Klingon" to do so. :)

[xsmommy]

CD, are you one of those ENGLISH FIRST types, or what? ; )

[Constitution Day]

I prefer to think of myself as a "Reality First" type. ;^)

[Tijeras_Slim]

If this gets framed as language CREATION versus language EVOLUTION, it may be the first Star Trek related thread to go to the Smoky Backroom.

[Chemist_Geek]

I prefer to think of myself as a "Reality First" type. ;^)

And you do realize that we are discussing the staffing of a mental health facility, which by definition caters to and deals with reality-challenged people?

;-)

[Constitution Day]

LOL!! Indeed I do.

[Hobsonphile]

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *thud*

Seriously, this just made my day.

[MattGarrett]

Frankly, I'm amazed that Oregon beat California to it.

Just another example of your tax dollars at work.