He's dead, Jim. -- Dr. "Bones" McCoy
My bad (maybe)
That would appear to be the logical answer. -- Science Officer Spock
Posted on 03/10/2003 3:08:02 PM PST by Shermy
OSLO, Norway - A flying sheep's head hit a concertgoer and fractured his skull at a concert of metal band Mayhem.
The band, part of Norway's death metal music scene, was carving up a dead sheep as part of its stage act when the animal's head flew off lead singer Maniac's knife and struck Per Kristian Hagen, 25.
The show was Thursday in Bergen, 487 kilometers (302 miles) west of the capital, Oslo.
"My relationship to sheep is a bit ambivalent now. I like them, but not when they come flying through the air," Hagen told The Associated Press Monday from his hospital room. "I have a headache now." He is expected to recover.
Hagen, a Mayhem fan, filed involuntary assault and battery charges against the band. The charges carry a maximum sentence of six months in prison.
Mayhem member Rune Eriksen, whose stage name is Blasphemer, said the incident was unfortunate.
"The whole thing was an accident, but maybe it would be an idea for another show," he said.
Eriksen promised Hagen a free ticket to the group's next performance.
Police detective Carl-Petter Leganger told the AP an investigation has started, but "nothing suggests this was a conscious act."
Irrelevent - you missed the operative word in the story - carving up a DEAD sheep. Animal cruelty laws do not apply.
He's dead, Jim. -- Dr. "Bones" McCoy
My bad (maybe)
That would appear to be the logical answer. -- Science Officer Spock
'Whining and complaining'? Cutting up a sheep on stage is 'nothing new'?
I hope you can keep so blase as performers probe further depths in the search for even more puerile shock entertainment, madame. Will simulated paedophilia, or necrophilia, jolt you out of your complacency? Be assured, it's coming.
Didn't the band Spinal Tap once lose a drummer in a similar accident? They were accidents, despite what it says on those websites and in that damned book!
Flying Sheep
(A tourist approaches a shepherd. The sounds of sheep and the outdoors are heard.)
Tourist: Good afternoon.
Shephrd: Eh, 'tis that.
Tourist: You here on holiday?
Shephrd: Nope, I live 'ere.
Tourist: Oh, good for you. Uh...those ARE sheep aren't they?
Shephrd: Yeh.
Tourist: Hmm, thought they were. Only, what are they doing up in the trees?
Shephrd: A fair question and one that in recent weeks 'as been much on my mind. It's my considered opinion that they're nestin'.
Tourist: Nesting?
Shephrd: Aye.
Tourist: Like birds?
Shephrd: Exactly. It's my belief that these sheep are laborin' under the misapprehension that they're birds. Observe their be'avior. Take for a start the sheeps' tendency to 'op about the field on their 'ind legs. Now witness their attmpts to fly from tree to tree. Notice that they do not so much fly as...plummet.
< Baaa baaa... flap flap flap ... whoosh ... thud. >
Tourist: Yes, but why do they think they're birds?
Shephrd: Another fair question. One thing is for sure, the sheep is not a creature of the air. They have enormous difficulty in the comparatively simple act of perchin'.
< Baaa baaa... flap flap flap ... whoosh ... thud. >
Trouble is, sheep are very dim. Once they get an idea in their 'eads, there's no shiftin' it.
Tourist: But where did they get the idea?
Shephrd: From Harold. He's that most dangerous of creatures, a clever sheep. 'e's realized that a sheep's life consists of standin' around for a few months and then bein' eaten. And that's a depressing prospect for an ambitious sheep.
Tourist: Well why don't just remove Harold?
Shephrd: Because of the enormous commercial possibilities if 'e succeeds.
They already do that... only, they call them 'movies'...
Is it illegal in their country to cut up a dead sheep? (BTW, are you squeamish about a butcher doing it, too, or just a rock band?)
I don't know what year it was, but a long time ago when Tina Turner was singing with her esteemed spouse Ike, he forced her to perform mock fellatio on a microphone on stage. I'm telling you, Byron, this is nothing new. If you want to place limitations on what people do (even when they're within legal limits) on stage, I'm sure you will find others who will join you in your crusade - I, for one, just don't care that much...as long as no laws are broken. I'll either choose to go see it, or not.
Durn, I was going to say something about the sheep hitting the fan, but you changed my mind. :->
When asked for comment, the booking sergeant at the police station would only say, "Loose lips zinc sheeps ..."
...(even when they're within legal limits)...
...as long as no laws are broken...
Sheesh. Who's your dad, Alan Dershowitz?
I'm not talking about the legalities, madame. I'm talking about the constant affront to decency by people who have no talent, no ability to entertain, and have to instead plumb the depths of sordidness in order to inspire the only emotion they're capable of delivering: revulsion. Perhaps -with your world-weary air- this is oh-so-passe, and for Chad, just another opening for some Z-grade yuks. But I beg to differ. I see it as another steep decline on the track, as we slouch towards Gomorrah. Apologists like yourself, who seem to think something's wrong only if it breaches the legal code, are part of the problem. Where's the outrage? For the Me Generation, it'll come only when they're personally affected, as usual. So I guess we'll wait, 'til your son or grandson, brings a sheep home? Yours in amazement, Byron.
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