I will keep you in my prayers my friend and if you need anything at all, don't hesitate to ask. Alzhiemer's is a heart wrenching experience for the survivors and my best advice is to focus on conforting your Dad, even if he doesn't realize who you are.
God Bless You,
Mike
No you're not alone Ms.B {{{HUGS}}} ... My mother has alzheimer's also ..
With all my mother has been through in life raising 7 kids by herself after my dad passed away, it breaks my heart to see her mind so lost. She isn't that bad yet, but I know it will only get worse. For now we just take one day at a time
It was hard, not just because I was ill and not up to packing up their house and making all the other arrangements (which is why it took a half a year), but because of the emotional stress of not having your parents able to appreciate that you are doing this out of love.
I remember just taking off crying and going to a movie one evening.
A lot of Dosers prayed for my Dad when he was really ill that summer and he made it and we got him and Mom to Texas. MJY1288 among others were special friends.
Don't hesitate to ask FReepers for prayers or help or advice, as many of them can really come through for you, if only to hold your hand, which can mean a lot.
My heart breaks for you Ms. B, but if you could find someone who could 'live-in', that would be awesome. It may be different for a man, but we had a woman come live with my mother when she got to the point where it was not possible for her to be alone. She didn't like it, but we told her it was that or a nursing home, so she accepted it. We didn't want to put her in a nursing home, but she would not live with any of us, and the live-in companion was the only option.
A friend of my older sister's had just gone through a divorce after 25 yrs. of marriage and had nowhere to go because she let her husband have the house because there were two teenage children still at home. She was an absolute angel, and lived with Mama from the fall of 1998 until last October. Mama developed pnuemonia, then when it became clear that she needed more day to day nursing help than Mary could provide, we finally put her in a nursing home, but told her it was a clinic to help her get over her sickness and some bedsores. Since she doesn't remember how long she's been there, it hasn't been a problem. She doesn't have any short term memory now, but she still remembers family members. We put her in a place that is very near to my hometown. She had been living a couple of hours away at our fishing camp since my Daddy died in 1981. Now, her brothers and sisters, as well as my siblings can visit her often. A good friend of mine from college lives nearby, and he'll drop in several times a week, on his way to or from work. Mama still remembers him, too!
We put off the nursing home as long as we could, but when it became clear that she didn't even consider the fishing camp 'home' anymore, we knew it didn't matter where she was, she'd always want to be going home. She has actually done well at this place. The nurses get all those who are not ambulatory up into wheelchairs every day and roll them down to the Nurses's station to gather and chat, then down to the Common Room to continue visiting. Mama was always a very social creature, so she's enjoying being with other folks now. She wanted to stay away from people for the first few years after she was diagnosed for fear of not saying the right things, or forgetting something she felt she should have remembered while with other folks. So she was pretty much a hermit when it came to friends, though Mary would take her out to the store or the mall to get her out of the house and for some mental stimulation. But she's mentally past that now, and into a less inhibited phase which is good.
Best of luck finding a good situation for your Dad. I'll keep your family in my prayers.