You need to decide whether you are writing an over-the-top spoof of the way conservatives are described by liberals, or if you are really writing some sort of conservative manifesto. It's either satire or it's not. I don't think you can say "I believe in God" and "I taught them to hold the pipe" in the same tract. It makes it look like you're really admititting to hooking people on crack if you mix that kind of thing in with beliefs that conservatives really do own. My 2¢.