[Senator Pardek]

A suspicious package found at the federal courthouse Saturday turned out to contain pornographic material and a note to Attorney General John Ashcroft, police said. The briefcase-size box was examined by the bomb squad, which decided to destroy it.

My mom did that when she found Playboys under my bed - those were the darkest times of my graduate school days.

[Eala]

A suspicious package found at the federal courthouse Saturday turned out to contain pornographic material and a note to Attorney General John Ashcroft, police said.

Love note from a member of the "Party of Tolerance^TM " -- the Democrats?

[CyberAnt]

And ... I don't blame him. The reason he didn't like it was because the media knew just how to position their cameras so that the whole time Ashcroft was talking, there was a bare breast also in the picture.

It didn't take Ashcroft long to figure out what the media was up to and to stop their foolishness.

I think modesty should rule - and I believe that is Mr. Ashcroft's position also.

[Redcloak]

The briefcase-size box was examined by the bomb squad, which decided to destroy it.

Yup. I can just imagine how this discussion must have gone down at the bomb squad...

"What is it?"

"A couple of nudie magzines, that's all."

"Any explosives?

"Nope."

"Ah, nuts!"

"I know..."

"Say... Did you tell anyone else?"

"No."

"Heh, heh, heh... What have you got in the bag?"

"(Laughing) I've got some det cord!"

"Looks like a dangerous device to me! What say we blow it up to make sure!?!"

YEAH!!! Um... I mean, that sounds prudent."

[Fzob]

Anyone check over at DU to see if they're claiming responsibility?

[map]

Last year, two partially nude statutes in the Great Hall of the Department of Justice were covered up.

Statutes? There is a joke in there somewhere.

[Newbomb Turk]

Bill Clintons lost breifcase is found.

[DaughterOfAnIwoJimaVet]

A Justice Department spokesman said it was done for aesthetic reasons, but there were reports that Ashcroft didn't like being photographed in front of them.

Hmmmm...I could swear I heard a "report" (probably on FNC) that AG Ashcroft laughed so hard he was in tears at the media's suggestion that he was bothered by the statues.

That's AP for you. Always digging up the truth.

[APBaer]

"The note suggested the package was dangerous"

Yes, could cause him to grow hairy palms and go blind.

[Grampa Dave]

This has to be from the Onion with this: Last year, two partially nude statutes in the Great Hall of the Department of Justice were covered up.

Statutes ?