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They were hiding BEER, not WEAPONS!
anonymous
Posted on 02/06/2003 8:54:38 AM PST by EggsAckley
They were hiding BEER, not WEAPONS!
Just minutes after U.S. Secretary of State Colin Powell played an audio tape of two members of Iraq's Republican Guard purportedly discussing removing weapons from a truck, the Guard members came forward to say they had been discussing beer, not weapons.
"I could understand why Secretary Powell would be all mad and everything if he thought we were talking about removing weapons from the truck," one of the Guard members said. "But the thing is, we weren't talking about weapons -- we were talking about empties."
According to the Iraqi, he and his friend were coming back to their base after a night of "getting polluted" on a twelve-pack of Old Milwaukee beer, a favorite of the Republican Guard.
"Before we got back to the base, I was like, dude, we better get rid of all of these empties or Saddam is gonna go biological on our asses," the Republican Guard member said.
"After I trashed my empties, my friend is like, 'Dude, I'm worried you have something left,' and I'm like, 'Dude, we evacuated everything,'" the Guard member said. "It was all about beer, man."
While the United States was openly skeptical of the Guards' account, the Iraqis' version of events drew strong praise from the President of France, Jacques Chirac, who called their story "courageous and charming."
In Paris, eager Anti-American protesters poured into the Champs d'Elysee to hail "Les Iraqi Beer Dudes" as international heroes.
Secretary Powell had no official comment, but a spokesman for Mr. Powell said that the Secretary of State was planning to spend the evening alone, hitting his head against a wall.
TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons; Unclassified
KEYWORDS: lessfilling; tastesgreat
Found this on an online diary site. Just had to post it.
To: EggsAckley
Yeah, and they didn't say don't use the word nerve gas, they actually said" better move the "beer ass".
To: Dr. Zoo
*PING*
You'll like this one.......hehehe
3
posted on
02/06/2003 8:59:23 AM PST
by
EggsAckley
(new public school motto: Aspire to Mediocrity)
To: TrappedInLiberalHell; ex-Texan
*PING*
4
posted on
02/06/2003 9:00:19 AM PST
by
EggsAckley
(new public school motto: Aspire to Mediocrity)
To: EggsAckley
Anti-American protesters poured into the Champs d'Elysee to hail "Les Iraqi Beer Dudes" LOL! Great post!
5
posted on
02/06/2003 9:00:30 AM PST
by
livius
To: livius
6
posted on
02/06/2003 9:05:29 AM PST
by
EggsAckley
(new public school motto: Aspire to Mediocrity)
To: EggsAckley
Here's the proof, I guess Powell missed this photo in his presentation:
To: Bacon Man; Hap
You just KNOW the Iraqis would drink Old Mil. Blech.
8
posted on
02/06/2003 9:07:43 AM PST
by
Xenalyte
To: Indy Pendance
"proudly brewed in Texas."
hehehe
9
posted on
02/06/2003 9:07:59 AM PST
by
EggsAckley
(new public school motto: Aspire to Mediocrity)
To: EggsAckley
Thank goodness there were no WMD...
Man, Powell must be embarassed. heh
10
posted on
02/06/2003 9:14:18 AM PST
by
Dr. Zoo
To: EggsAckley
Old Milwaukee beer
From Consumer Reports:
Of the beers rated then and now, most did about the same. One exception was Old Milwaukee, tied for top domestic beer last time but lower in the pack this time. After our 1996 article, its brewer changed from Stroh's to Pabst. The new brew has a less intense flavor, with fewer of the fresh, floral, and fruity notes associated with better beers.
Present Ranking Among Domestic Lagers: 10th
To: EggsAckley
Anyone who drinks Old Milwaukee needs killin'.
To: Billthedrill
We used to buy it in college cause it was the cheapest buzz in town...
To: laker_dad
"Old Milwaukee"...tastes as great as it name...."OLD".
To: EggsAckley
15
posted on
02/06/2003 9:45:08 AM PST
by
Jaxter
To: EggsAckley
Well, as Jerry Lee Lewis once said, "what made Milwaukee famous, is gonna make losers out of them!"
16
posted on
02/06/2003 9:49:36 AM PST
by
Revolting cat!
(Someone left the cake out in the rain I dont think that I can take it coz it took so long to bake it)
To: Jaxter
My regular brew. Can't beat it for the money.
To: EggsAckley
My theory is that it was Sadaam's secret stash of gay porn.
To: EggsAckley
Wait a second, doesn't Old Milwaukee Light count as a biological weapon? I know I get sick just thinking about it!
19
posted on
02/06/2003 11:51:00 AM PST
by
Bacon Man
(Bacon: It's not just for breakfast, lunch, dinner and late night snackin anymore!)
To: EggsAckley
Ha! Just sent this to my kids, who will appreciate it.
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