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Why Men Are So Damn Cool!!!!
unk
| unk
| no one has confessed
Posted on 01/18/2003 5:47:15 PM PST by Boot Hill
Why Men are so Damn Cool:
- Your rear end is never a factor in a job interview.
- Your orgasms are real. Always.
- Your last name stays put.
- The garage is all yours.
- Wedding plans take care of themselves.
- You never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid.
- Car mechanics tell you the truth.
- You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut.
- Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.
- Same work .. more pay.
- Wrinkles-add character.
- You don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch adjustments.
- Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.
- If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
- People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.
- New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
- One mood, ALL the damn time.
- Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds.
- A five-day vacation requires only 1 suitcase.
- You can open all your own jars.
- You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
- Your underwear is $10 for a three-pack.
- If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.
- You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat.
- Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
- You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without ever thinking "He must be mad at me."
- No maxi-pads.
- If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.
- You are not expected to know the names of more than five colors.
- You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
- You are unable to see wrinkles in clothes.
- The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
- Your belly usually hides your big hips.
- One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.
- You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife.
- Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives, on December 24th, in minutes.
- The world is your urinal.
TOPICS: Culture/Society; Miscellaneous; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: nosexforyou
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If this has been posted before, I don't care, because men are so damn cool!!!
--Boot Hill
1
posted on
01/18/2003 5:47:15 PM PST
by
Boot Hill
To: All
2
posted on
01/18/2003 5:48:22 PM PST
by
Support Free Republic
(Your support keeps Free Republic going strong!)
To: Boot Hill
I LOVE IT. I am so tired of the men bashing in our society. (I'm a woman) Men are so great. In the workplace, they do their job without all the gossip and back stabbing. They are so real. Hurray for men. I hope everyone reads this.
3
posted on
01/18/2003 5:50:58 PM PST
by
Angel
To: Boot Hill
And we can write our names in teh snow... THAT is the best part...
4
posted on
01/18/2003 5:51:11 PM PST
by
Chad Fairbanks
(We've got Armadillos in our trousers. It's really quite frightening.)
To: Boot Hill
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.Heh! I'm taking mine to the grave! :)
5
posted on
01/18/2003 5:51:33 PM PST
by
AntiGuv
(™)
To: Boot Hill
When I go to bed tonight I'll dream I live in this world.
Until then, Mrs. Billorites says she "owns my ass."
:oops! gotta go. bbl.
To: Boot Hill
And #38 -
You can wake up from a sleep, and be out the door within 5 minutes.
To: Boot Hill
Too funny!
And soooo true (except the equal pay thing....).
8
posted on
01/18/2003 5:54:02 PM PST
by
MonroeDNA
(What's the frequency, Kenneth?)
To: Support Free Republic
I guess I've been around here for about 5 years or so now. Time sure flies!
When Jim Robinson started this site, it was because he was fed up with the liberal media, and how they would not let people worldwide know about the corruption of the Clinton Administration. A few of us, equally concerned, (with great luck) found it fast.
In the early days, FR was a day-to-day operation, always on the brink of bankruptcy. Jim kept on, and we chipped in when it became too much. We knew how important this site was, and is. Sometimes, it came down to the wire, and we wrote checks, and sent them in, as best we could.
Look at it now. We all get our best information from this site. It is huge, with thousands of posters, and millions of readers. Yet Jim still keeps it alive because of his conviction, and he is absolutely NOT making a profit on it. He just believes. As do we.
BTW, did you know that the founder of this site is in a wheelchair (sorry Jim; I know you think it doesn't make a r*ts a$$ difference. Hey, some folks out there need to come down a peg, like I have.).
Think of it! In the darkest days of the Clinton Administration, there was a lone internet site where people with integrity, brains, and sheer gumption could discuss the dangers faced by the US. Not on CNN, for sure.
Earthmovers like Drudge, Ann Coulter, Rush, WFBuckley, his brother, Savage, Buchanan, both houses of Congress (many) check in to see what we think.
The opposition checks it out, too. Like the NY times staff, CNN, etc. Trust me, they all come here to read. Even YOUR post. You know by now how they are whining about Rush? We're next, as soon as they figure out how they can trash this site without it getting a million hits.
I've been broke; I've been not broke. I've slept in my car. I know how it feels to be squeezed tight with bills. Folks with giant bills: You're not alone, and you have friends here. :)
If you love this site as much as I do, please, please sign up for automatic payment of just $3 per month. Don't be embarrassed if you think this is too little. It absolutely is not. You $3 a month folks are our grassroots movement heroes. Be proud. Become one of the thousand points of light here, and you will so feel proud every month. We'll thank you for it, and are so glad to have you on board.
I know things are rough out there. But you are tough, and a member of the greatest grassroots freedom movement in 100 years. Together we are making history, and will change the world, as we already have. The best is yet to come.
Most countries out there would consider this website illegal. They hate us, for our freedom. Their systems cannot stand, in the face of Freedom. The people there read us when they can, when they are allowed to, and are not being tortured. They flock to us, America, because they want to be free. Help us help them.
Would you please, please consider signing up for just $3 a month? Please? Thats all it takes, really, believe it or not. You will make a world of difference, to, well, the world. Be proud, Americans, and please help out!
9
posted on
01/18/2003 5:54:47 PM PST
by
MonroeDNA
(What's the frequency, Kenneth?)
To: Boot Hill
#39. Farts are celebrated.
10
posted on
01/18/2003 5:55:57 PM PST
by
MonroeDNA
(What's the frequency, Kenneth?)
To: AntiGuv
I've had the barber since '68. The other day he told me he would be retiring soon. I almost had a heart attack!
--Boot Hill
To: Boot Hill
PLEASE STOP POSTING THIS
BRAINLESS B*&$~&^&T.
THANK YOU.
12
posted on
01/18/2003 5:59:09 PM PST
by
XLurk
To: Boot Hill
37. The world is your urinal. Being able to pee standing up is not an unmixed blessing.
There is , first of all, that horrible feeling as you're standing there that you really ought to be sitting there.
Then there's the dreaded 'shower-head effect'.
And finally, there is no man on earth who doesn't shudder when he remembers his first pair of pants with a zipper fly.
13
posted on
01/18/2003 6:01:21 PM PST
by
Grut
To: Support Free Republic
Okay, okay, I will donate ((arms raised and waiving a little white flag)), just make that picture go away, PLEASE! Argh!
14
posted on
01/18/2003 6:01:56 PM PST
by
Chong
(Thank you SFR.)
To: Boot Hill; WhyisaTexasgirlinPA
A Texas bump to someone that appreciates all this stuff.
15
posted on
01/18/2003 6:02:54 PM PST
by
SeeRushToldU_So
( Something witty, etc, etc....)
Comment #16 Removed by Moderator
To: XLurk
PLEASE STOP POSTING THIS BRAINLESS B*&$~&^&T. THANK YOU. I'd like to buy a sense of humor, Pat...
17
posted on
01/18/2003 6:04:53 PM PST
by
null and void
(or have a vowel movement...)
To: XLurk
LOL, there's always one!
To: Boot Hill
Great post!
Bookmarked and BUMPED
19
posted on
01/18/2003 6:07:31 PM PST
by
Lancey Howard
(Tag line (optional, printed after your name on post):)
To: MonroeDNA
....and they don't smell, either!
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