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To: Born in a Rage
Going into someones bedroom at a party doesn't mean they want to have sex anymore than someone walking into your kitchen means they want to cook you an apple pie. Get it?

In this era of feminism and equality, why are we demanding that men take better care of us than we do, respect us more than we do and use more common sense than we do?

I am released of any responsibility for my physical actions as soon as my mouth says no. A man must be in complete control of his body at all times. I can act like the worst kind of skanky slut, but he must be a gentleman or go to jail.

Look, I believe that no ought to mean no. But you ought to know as well as I do that as women, we screw with this rule all the time. "Why no dear, you don't need to make a fuss over my birthday." What's wrong? "Nothing." And women do say "No" when they mean no, but some also say no and mean maybe.

We are only going to make this problem worse if we insist to our young women that they need make no provisions at all for their own safety. Hey, baby just say "I'm not sure about this" as you ALLOW him to take of your clothes after you've kissed and petted and gotten drunk, and you're home free. It's all HIS fault.

189 posted on 01/07/2003 9:17:36 PM PST by Dianna
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To: Dianna
In this era of feminism and equality, why are we demanding that men take better care of us than we do, respect us more than we do and use more common sense than we do?

Rape isn't a matter of common sense, it's a violent crime.

I am released of any responsibility for my physical actions as soon as my mouth says no. A man must be in complete control of his body at all times. I can act like the worst kind of skanky slut, but he must be a gentleman or go to jail.

Some men might think that a woman winking at them or wearing a low-cut shirt is a woman "acting like a skanky slut" - and yes if he rapes her he should be locked up in a prison like the animal he is. And yes, a man should be "in complete control" over his body at all times, aren't you?

Look, I believe that no ought to mean no. But you ought to know as well as I do that as women, we screw with this rule all the time. "Why no dear, you don't need to make a fuss over my birthday." What's wrong? "Nothing." And women do say "No" when they mean no, but some also say no and mean maybe.

Ummm, no actually I don't "screw with this rule all of the time" - if you do then maybe you are part of the problem - don't confuse your actions and/or behavior with that of others.

We are only going to make this problem worse if we insist to our young women that they need make no provisions at all for their own safety.

I do think women need to be careful and think of their safety because there are many nutso people out there....that doesn't mean I excuse the nutso people.

Hey, baby just say "I'm not sure about this" as you ALLOW him to take of your clothes after you've kissed and petted and gotten drunk, and you're home free. It's all HIS fault.

Strippers take their clothes off for men all of the time and give them lap dances - they aren't giving the okay for every man in the bar to rape them. And do really think every virgin bride-to-be has never taken her shirt off while alone with her man....and if she does, are you saying she 'deserves' to be raped? I sincerely hope not.

193 posted on 01/07/2003 10:22:41 PM PST by Born in a Rage
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To: Dianna
I think no means no.

I do think women are encourage to use the current ambiguity in our social mores in fickle and capricious ways.

Although you didn't say it, the tone of your post seems to imply that maybe men can ignore "no" under some circumstances. Well, maybe, but it had better be a well established relationship wherein the guy can be confident that "we are playing that game."

A woman who tries to play those head games with me won't get laid. That's asking me to risk a lot to enhance her little nut, and I won't get anything but annoyed.

I do agree that rights and responsibilities should go hand-in-hand, and the way they have been decoupled in the last 30-40 years breeds wickedness.

I don't have time to scan the all of the posts right now, but while looking for 189, I noticed someone posted a clarification regarding the facts of the case. I hate it when that happens!

215 posted on 01/08/2003 4:19:40 AM PST by Yeti
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