Because so many of us have been burned...
Why is it this topic always generates so many impassioned posts?
Because the rules for how men and women get along with each
other have changed; instead of having one set of rules we all agree
on, each side is now working with it's own set. The previous rules
worked to look out for men, women and children; the current rule
sets have evolved to promote the maximum betterment of each
side's (short term) interest at the expense of the others.
So now the common feeling in approaching the opposite sex is one
of going into 'Indian Territory'; we go carefully, mindful of our own
wants, wary of the wants of the other. We know that in any conflict
there is no cultural arbitration available, only the courts. The average
relationship is always in danger of becoming a zero-sum game.
So the powerful attraction between the sexes, necessary for any species
to continue, is now continually at war with every individual's self interest:
We are drawn to each other's company, but we no longer know how to
get along. We dance, each to our own music, out of rhythym and synch
with the other, stepping on each other's feet, knocking each other down,
desperately wishing we could get it right.
And just to increase the anguish level, we see, here and there, couples
dancing smoothly together, smiling as they turn and and swirl across the floor....we see; we know it can be done...