Empty victory for a hollow man How Norm Coleman sold his soul for a Senate seat.

Salon.com ^ | Nov. 7, 2002 | By Garrison Keillor

[AlwaysLurking]

Empty victory for a hollow man How Norm Coleman sold his soul for a Senate seat.

http://www.salon.com/politics/feature/2002/11/07/minnesota/index_np.html By Garrison Keillor

Nov. 7, 2002 | Norm Coleman won Minnesota because he was well-financed and well-packaged. Norm is a slick retail campaigner, the grabbiest and touchingest and feelingest politician in Minnesota history, a hugger and baby-kisser, and he's a genuine boomer candidate who reinvents himself at will. The guy is a Brooklyn boy who became a left-wing student radical at Hofstra University with hair down to his shoulders, organized antiwar marches, said vile things about Richard Nixon, etc. Then he came west, went to law school, changed his look, went to work in the attorney general's office in Minnesota. Was elected mayor of St. Paul as a moderate Democrat, then swung comfortably over to the Republican side. There was no dazzling light on the road to Damascus, no soul-searching: Norm switched parties as you'd change sport coats.

Norm is glib. I once organized a dinner at the Minnesota Club to celebrate F. Scott Fitzgerald's birthday and Norm came, at the suggestion of his office, and spoke, at some length and with quite some fervor, about how much Fitzgerald means to all of us in St. Paul, and it was soon clear to anyone who has ever graded 9th grade book reports that the mayor had never read Fitzgerald. Nonetheless, he spoke at great length, with great feeling. Last month, when Bush came to sprinkle water on his campaign, Norm introduced him by saying, "God bless America is a prayer, and I believe that this man is God's answer to that prayer." Same guy.

(Jesse Ventura, of course, wouldn't have been caught dead blathering at an F. Scott Fitzgerald dinner about how proud we are of the Great Whoever-He-Was and his vision and his dream blah-blah-blah, and that was the refreshing thing about Jesse. The sort of unctuous hooey that comes naturally and easily to Norm Coleman Jesse would be ashamed to utter in public. Give the man his due. He spoke English. He didn't open his mouth and emit soap bubbles. He was no suck up. He had more dignity than to kiss the president's shoe.)

Norm got a free ride from the press. St. Paul is a small town and anybody who hangs around the St. Paul Grill knows about Norm's habits. Everyone knows that his family situation is, shall we say, very interesting, but nobody bothered to ask about it, least of all the religious people in the Republican Party. They made their peace with hypocrisy long ago. So this false knight made his way as an all-purpose feel-good candidate, standing for vaguely Republican values, supporting the president.

He was 9 points down to Wellstone when the senator's plane went down. But the tide was swinging toward the president in those last 10 days. And Norm rode the tide. Mondale took a little while to get a campaign going. And Norm finessed Wellstone's death beautifully. The Democrats stood up in raw grief and yelled and shook their fists and offended people. Norm played his violin. He sorrowed well in public, he was expertly nuanced. The mostly negative campaign he ran against Wellstone was forgotten immediately. He backpedalled in the one debate, cruised home a victor. It was a dreadful low moment for the Minnesota voters. To choose Coleman over Walter Mondale is one of those dumb low-rent mistakes, like going to a great steakhouse and ordering the tuna sandwich. But I don't envy someone who's sold his soul. He's condemned to a life of small arrangements. There will be no passion, no joy, no heroism, for him. He is a hollow man. The next six years are not going to be kind to Norm.

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About the writer Garrison Keillor is the creator and host of the nationally syndicated radio show "A Prairie Home Companion," broadcast on more than 500 public radio stations nationwide. For more columns by Keillor, visit his column archive.

[nathanbedford]

I think you are right, he needed to slime Coleman. This is nothing but liberal neo-McCarthism. The interesting question is what process of rationalization permits a man who is obviously intelligent and very savvy in public relations sense to indulge in this sort of slime? What are his assumptions about us? About liberals? About independents of whom there are a lot in Minn?

[gusopol3]

Sounds like a Viking

[andreak]

I think the word "evil" is used way to much, and it is losing much of its meaning. Those who truly feel compassion, and were hurting after the death of Senator Wellstone are not "evil." I don't believe the Clintons, flawed though they are, (aren't we all) are evil either. I think the world would be so much better if we stick to issues and stop throwing epithets around. Let's save the word "evil" for truly evil people such as Saddam Hussein and Adolf Hitler.

[Taliesan]

So Coleman is glib and polished and adulterous and has no core beliefs.

And Bill Clinton is one of the good guys.

Uh-huh.

[Ditter]

Hey Gal come tell us how much of this dirt on Norm Coleman is just so much barbara striesand.

[hope]

Salon's editorials have about as much worth is it's stock.

[hope]

Bwahaa, You still think it's about sex don't you? You dims are all still stuck in 1st gear.

[js1138]

Keillor's "home life" is also "interesting".

[Bernard Marx]

Don't know,but,I'm sure Garrison has claimed "its his private life" about others with "family situations".

I don't know either, but I'm curious about Keillor's own "family situation."

[OMParty]

Don't forget--we also blamed Ross Perot. Incidentally, on last Saturday's PHC, (the last one I'll ever listen to) Garrison gave the rats credit for the Civil Rights Act, even though the Republicans pushed it through over the objections of southern dems, including old man Gore.

[Gruffbear]

As a 25-year resident of Crocus Hill, a neighborhood next near his Summit Hill residence, I can tell you on good authority that Keillor is not well liked in the place he calls home. He is regarded as dour and condescending. He has refused to talk to the local newspaper, the St. Paul Pioneer Press, because they have the audacity to report on his personal life. Grand Avenue restaurateurs and shopkeepers consider him arrogant and standoffish in the extreme. He is apparently a member of an elevated social class to which you do not belong.

His bitter, sarcastic, highly personal attacks directed at Norm Coleman are completely in keeping with his character. Keillor is a world-class jerk who has spent thirty years of his life making condescending inferences about Minnesotans in front of a microphone. Maybe he fancies himself a latter-day Sinclair Lewis, but his view of Minnesota people and institutions is contemptuous and unloving. I hope he re-exiles himself to New York.

[HardStarboard]

These guys really are concerned about "soul"!!

Witness their behavior during the celebration of Paul Wellstone's soul!

[NotJustAnotherPrettyFace]

Bump!

[a keillor neighbor]

You people are remarkably precious...and in possession of prodigious hollow judgment. So this be republicanism, this little virtual pillory I've stumbled upon.

I'll witness: Norm actually is as smarmy and chameleon as a reasonably well-meaning person can get. You all can vote for him when he makes his inevitable run for the white house. He's no evil-doer, but he's not that real either. He is his own strawman.

[nowotny]

For all his faux-folksiness, Garrison Keillor has long been known - or should I say infamous - for being one of the angriest liberals on planet Earth. He rarely leaves the Upper West Side of Manhattan, except to do his radio show, because to him it's the only place populated by people as intelligent as Garrison Keillor.

No kidding. Libs pride themselves on thinking they are more intelligent and superior than the rest of the proletariat. Their charade is a delusion, and a failing one at that.

[GoMonster]

yeah he was nine points down in zogby poll. same poll that had strickland down by 11. same poll that had coleman up by six three weeks before. Salon Sucks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[K Cabron]

Garrison Keillor has displayed a very niggardly use of common sense. And that comment about Norm's family situation being, "...shall we say very interesting", what is he trying to say, that he is married in name only? Did he commit rape, perjury, did he lie to his constituents, was he impeached, was he caught fornicating with his underlings? Oops! Sorry that must have been someone else that Mr. Keillor holds in high esteem.
What a sanctamonious prig!

[reagan-won-ww3]

almost makes you miss jimmy carter... almost.

[samtheman]

I got bored with this tuneless crooner a long time ago. His stuff is stale, repititious, predictable and boring. And now he adds an unhealthy measure of hate to his dull-witted repetoire. How pedestrian.