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While you unleash a can of whoop ass on terrorists, your former boss has received a new award. Bill Clinton was inducted into the Arkansas Black Hall of Fame. Now before you start hurling any food that you have. (MoJo thinks it would be rude to hurl on a fellow troop just trying to exchange emails with his/her family) Keep in mind, that he did a "bang up job" with the black community. He managed to keep the black community enslaved for yet another 40 years on social programs. (Another one of those "FEEL YOUR PAIN" programs) He also apologized for some damn reason in Africa for the slave trade. Listen here Bubba. If anyone needs to start apologizing, it begins with the warlords in Africa that sold their own people into slavery and then proceeded to sell their neighbors to the French, Portugese, Spanish, and English. Mr. Black Man himself declared that "white America has taken notice of the great advancements in the black community". (MoJo couldn't help it, but I snored through the rest of his pathetic speech. Either that or I was going to have to hurl all over the dog) Here's the kicker: He believes that President Bush should do more to advance the black causes in Africa and help save the black community in America. Here's MoJo's take: Black America will be saved when they muster up some self respect and get rid of the lowlifes that creep around them 24/7. Say sayanora to Bill, Reverend Al "PorkChop" Sharpton, Reverend Jesse "Jackass" Jackson, Queasy M Fume, (Kweisi Mfume-to you nitpicky types) and Maxie Pad Waters...you would be doing yourself and generations of black children a huge favor. Until then, get used to this cow licking his lips and playing you all for SUCKAS!
Last week, MoJo was discussing with all of you the wonderful mentality of Louis Farrkhan. Well, it didn't take anytime whatsoever for our little radioactive "Preacher Of Hate" to get started on his favorite subject: MIGHTY WHITEY! You know who you are. You evil creatures you! Anyways, he is "deeply disturbed" by the media's insistence on jumping on this "innocent until proven guilty black man" because he's two things the media hates: Black and Muslim. Well, MoJo thinks Farrakhan has been living too close to the liquor cabinent because the only two people in this world that get away with race baiting, false accusations, spewing hatred, feeling isolated, hating Christians and Jews openly, and calling for public lynchings of Republicans. (Before I get hate mail, I realize that there are many more black males that don't buy into this idiot, but for antagonizing Liberal purposes) With people like Phil Donahue, Chris Matthews, and every Liberal mouthpiece out there defending people like Louie..is it no wonder there is such animosity when he speaks. What really riled up MoJo is the fact he wanted to point out that Timothy McVeigh was a "Christian" and he was somehow treated better than John Muhammed (He's the sniper) has been. Please! I'm sure Diane Sawyers is just dying to do an interview to show how John was either molested by a Catholic priest or something dealing with those "evil Christians, Jews, and white people". So? Spare MoJo the damn pity party! WE DON'T CARE! LET HIM FRY!
Today's "JACKASS AWARD" goes to all the politicians in America that have spent millions and millions of dollars trying to get re-elected or elected..only to be losing or thinking of ways to pull a "Robert Torricelli". I'm thinking about all of you sitting here reading the Useless News Tidbits and MoJo is thinking you could use the money for things perhaps not important to these politicians. For example, Gray Davis in California recently spent 100k to have dinner with some of his "closest constituents" to talk over the "important issues that matter to California".(MoJo thinks if this idiot doesn't know what's important to California after one term.. HE NEEDS TO GO HOME!) Anyways, I was thinking what 100k would do for all of you. Gosh, you could actually get some soap. Not that damn soap on the rope that I've seen in pictures. (I realize the convenience, but they feel like sandpaper on the skin) Also, how about some real decent food. Cup of Noodles can only do so much. If you are lucky to get that. While you are eating, Cup of Noodles...Gray Davis' buddies are eating "caviar, filet mignon, and some damn French wine I can't pronounce or spell". All this to get in touch with what California voters want. Hello? GET OFF YOUR ASS and WALK THE STREETS. Go visit some actual California voters in their homes. Perhaps, they could shed some light on what it's like to eat things like hamburgers, hot dogs, and grilled cheese sandwiches. (MoJo thinks Californians just want to know that they will have power to actually cook food. I'm sure the power never goes out in the Governor's mansion). So? These politicians need to get their priorities straight. Here's hoping that the voters send them back to the common man's world. They get the "JACKASS AWARD" for today.
Never fear troops! The United States Postal Service has decided not to raise the postal prices until the next review board in January. Now I'm sure we'd all care, but they can't seem to get things where they need to be in the first place. For example, it took 4 weeks to get a letter that was sent from the other side of town. Hello?
The picture today is of Russian President Vladimir Putin. (MoJo can hear it now! UGH! I want babes) Anyways, here's a title that I thought was worth sharing with you: "Putin's Own Gas Caused The Deaths Of Some Of The Hostages and Rebels". Hey! No fair! President Bush can't do that. Although, if you look at his face; it wouldn't suprise anyone how "gifted" is in that area. The picture today is of Russian President Vladimir Putin. (MoJo can hear it now! UGH! I know you want babes) Anyways, here's a news title that I thought was worth sharing with you: "Putin's Own Gas Caused The Deaths Of Some Of The Hostages and Rebels". Hey! No fair! President Bush can't do that. Although, if you look at his face; it wouldn't suprise anyone how "gifted" he is in that area. (In all seriousness, MoJo wishes to send sympathies and prayers to the victims of terrorism at the hands of those peace loving Muslims)
The two lovely people above are none other than British R&B star, Craig David, and Mexican actress Salma Hayek. It seems that Salma was "hanging out in London"(You know how that is when you have way too much money and time on your hands..don't you? NOT) and she and her entourage wanted to catch a show with a talented singer. Anyways, while she was dining at a local eatery, she was sitting at the table and the offer to see Craig David came up. She looked at the member of her entourage and stated "Who the hell is that loser?" As the person was getting ready to answer, a man turns around and says "Hello, I'm Craig David". She was said to be very embarrassed. DUH! (MoJo hasn't gotten word yet as to whether or not she ended up seeing the show) \ NEWSFLASH!! Senator Paul Wellstone is still dead. (MoJo can already feel the groans coming..INSENSITIVE LITTLE CHICK) Really, I'm telling you that he's still dead. Yet, the news media seems to just go on and on about this fact. It's a whole lot of psychological neediness that works on MoJo. The conservatives don't want to seem heartless and the Liberals don't want to seem too anxious to get someone in there that could actually win. So? They volunteer to go on television to out sympathize the other. MoJo thinks they should all go to the local pub and have a few drinks. They should take the rest of the year off. (Remember, we are all safer when Congress is out of session) They should mourn, but for goodness sakes...HE'S STILL DEAD. MoJo wanted to take this segment to thank each and every one of you for fighting against the terrorists that tried to ruin our lives. While I can sit here and make absolutely no sense, you fight so I can do it. You will sit there at your computer and you'll be thinking about your families, friends, and activities going on at home. Please know that you are all missed, cherished, and loved. Remember, if the choice is between killing the enemy or getting killed yourself: POINT THE GUN AND HAVE AT IT! I expect you all to come home. Realistically, I know that's impossible. However, I believe in miracles. I've seen plenty of them in my life. If ever we were to meet, I'd thank you personally. So would ever person in the Canteen. Until then, we march forward as you march forward. We keep our heads high when you don't feel like it. We hold our heads down in prayer when you can't. We hold you close to our hearts when yours is hurting. God Bless you!!!
WOOHOO Can you say "THIS BUD'S FOR YOU"? Here's Jillian Barbarie "The Fox NFL Pre-Game Weather Girl" waiting for all of you to come home safely. Thank you for going along for the ride Thank You
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