Maureen Dowd: BUSH 'BOY EMPEROR'

Drudge Report ^ | Oct 19, 2002 | Drudge

[The Raven]

XXXXX DRUDGE REPORT XXXXX SAT OCT 19, 2002 11:42:34 ET XXXXX

DOWD: BUSH 'BOY EMPEROR'

NY TIMES op-ed queen Maureen Dowd is planning to rip President Bush like she has never ripped before in a dispatch set for Sunday publication, sources close to the columnist tell DRUDGE.

Dowd, courting controversy, declares: "The Boy Emperor picked up the morning paper and, stunned, dropped his Juicy Juice box with the little straw attached. 'Oh, man,' he wailed. 'North Korea's got nukes... 'Get me Condi!' the boy yelled. 'And a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.'"

Dowd refers to Bush as a "boy" no less than ten times in the column she's planning to file.

"'Huh?' the Boy said."

Dowd mocks.

MORE

"Boy Emperor was starting to feel bamboozled."

Dowd stabs.

'"Why are we mad at North Korea for flouting its international agreements when we flout our international agreements?' the Boy wondered."

Dowd pops.

"...the Boy pressed."

Dowd punches.

"The Boy Emperor was more befuddled than ever."

On and on Dowd goes until she hits 711 brutal words, and finally comes up for air.

[jimbo123]

Dowd finally went over the edge when Douglas traded her in for Zeta Jones at the same time she received her AARP membership invitation.

[deport]

Maybe they can get Rep. Dan Burton to write a rebuttal to the 'gurls' article.....

Congressman Cussin' Mad Over Clinton-Korea Charges

Rep. Gary Ackerman, D-NY, blew his stack during a radio debate with Rep. Dan Burton, R-Ind., on Thursday over charges that ex-President Clinton gave North Korea the bomb - growing so agitated at one point that his cursing had to be bleeped from the air.

[Slyfox]

I do believe Maureen Dowd just likes to hear herself bitch.

I was going to say 'bitch and MOAN' but I think that would make her even more jealous of Zeta-Jones.

[inkling]

I've heard industry insiders joke about how touched up that first photo of Dowdy is. Here's a "candid" shot of her at an award banquet two years ago:

And here's a candid photo of her replacement

Wow, that was a tough choice, Michael!

[MadIvan]

What a great letter! My applaud goes to you, Ivan!

My sincere thanks. But Maureen Dowd is an easy target.

Regards, Ivan

[Cuttnhorse]

"...nor will it fill the barren Sahara of your womb."

LOL!! Good letter Ivan.

[MadIvan]

Let's try a translation on Ms. Dowd, based on the theory that often times people extrapolate from real life in their writing:

"The Boy Emperor picked up the morning paper and, stunned, dropped his Juicy Juice box with the little straw attached. 'Oh, man,' he wailed. 'North Korea's got nukes... 'Get me Condi!' the boy yelled. 'And a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.'"

Meaning, she woke up alone in her New York apartment, looked in the mirror, found to her horror she was a little older and didn't have a man in her life. She then went into the kitchen for some comfort food.

"'Huh?' the Boy said."

She perhaps can't get the song "Mad About the Boy" out of her head, and was looking at Michael Douglas' photo.

"Boy Emperor was starting to feel bamboozled."

Which she must feel every day: a late middle aged, not too bright, lefty writer who is unmarried and with no family. Where could life have its meaning for her, except in the perpetuation of malice and bile?

'"Why are we mad at North Korea for flouting its international agreements when we flout our international agreements?' the Boy wondered."

"But Michael promised he'd love me forever!"

"...the Boy pressed."

No comment on what she wants pressed.

"The Boy Emperor was more befuddled than ever."

Obviously she saw Catherine Zeta Jones is pregnant.

And so on.

Regards, Ivan

[ForGod'sSake]

Better?

FGS

[TheRedSoxWinThePennant]

here maureen this will make it all better

[el_texicano]

"Dowd should write on toilet paper."

Yep, that would save us all a lot of trouble and discomfort. :-)

[RGSpincich]

Dowd explored(ugh)...exposed(double ugh)...the spoiled child

[Paul Atreides]

She's just bitter because she looks terrible in a thong.

[wardaddy]

WOW...big difference. I've only seen the doctored pic....

I didn't know Douglas cavorted with her....not suprised though. She whines like most frustrated feminists who've found out too late that all that dogma they embraced in their 20s is sort of hollow in their 40s.

Now....what does gorgeous Zeta see in that old geezer. Don't say $$$$$.....she's got plenty of her own.

I always thought Douglas's ex-wife Diandra was pretty sexy in her own right. I think she was about 19 when he first snagged her.....he's a horndog to be sure.

[Paul Atreides]

[ItisaReligionofPeace]

Ouch!!!

[ItisaReligionofPeace]

can someone fill me in on the Clinton, Douglas, Dowd connection?

[RGSpincich]

Dowd finally went over the edge when Douglas traded her in

Dowd's a loser. Douglas stayed with Carl Malden longer than he stayed with her.

[Kip Lange]

I love it. When the libs can't find anything that sticks, they go with: "He's dumb". They did it to Reagan. It didn't work; Reagan is taking his rightful place in history amongst other great leaders. If this is the best ol' Dowdy can do, it bodes well for Bush supporters. ;-)

[Petronski]

Bitter and barren, the unfortunate sobbing cow known as Maureen Dowd remained childless and unloved late today.

In other news, Catherine Zeta-Jones is still ravishingly beautiful, warmly loved by a caring husband, and obviously bubbling with fecundity.


I hereby award Dame Dowd the weekly Beckel Prize for excellence in providing the FreeRepublic community with the total Schadenfreude experience. Thanks, ma'am, and don't forget your hormone replacement tablet today!

[Balata]

Good find. Thanks.