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There is another approach that doesn't work either...the child is acting up in the store...temper tantrum, whining incessantly or down-right screaming, and the perplexed mother just IGNORES the behaviour. Yikes...I always wonder if the mother ignores the problem because she is too afraid to discipline the child in public or whether she thinks if she just ignores the problem it'll go away---?

I always wonder if the mother ignores the problem because she is too afraid to discipline the child in public or whether she thinks if she just ignores the problem it'll go away---?

I have always wondered about that as well! When my son was in the screaming infant/toddler phases I would remove both of us from whatever crowd we were in until he chilled out. I also wouldn't take him to restaraunts until he got through those phases, as I hate few things as much as a lot of noise while I'm trying to eat and I assumed others were the same way.

Those are the lessons I teach my child- manners and consideration- and I don't teach them through beating.

I had a similar experience when my son was 2 1/2. He went balistic in the middle of the food court at the mall. I ended up carrying him kicking and screaming out of the mall because I was too afraid to swat his bottom in public. I certainly don't beat my child.

Time outs work for him now but there was a time when he would misbehave, look at me, at say, "give me a time out". After one incident where he kept returning to a "time out" for a total of 1 hour and 1/2 I determined the "swat" was a better deterant.

He has a little boy friend who is so mild he never gets into trouble and a little girl friend whose parent's are all talk and no action. Then they can't figure out why no one wants their daughter at their house. She blows you off now matter what you say.

I have one of those children that throws temper tantrums.

One of my suggestions to other parents is to go ask the parent if they needs help.

In my case, I know I do usually need help when my daughter throws a tantrum. She has cerebral palsy. She looks normal, but has severe brain damage.

I also have 2 other children. If we're at home, we don't have a problem. My daughter who is throwing the tantrum goes to her room. She may scream for an hour, but she is not hurting anything.

In public, if I'm with all my kids I'm trying to get the other 2 kids, and then take care of the temper tantrum. Sometimes, I just ignore the tantrum until I get the other 2 kids settled.

Sometimes I ignore it, and try to get to the car as fast as possible.

The most embarrassing time was at a restaurant. My daughter wanted a soda, and I said no and she threw a fit. I barely managed to get her outside. She was kicking and screaming so hard that I couldn't move her. I literally straddled her and pinned her arms down. For 20 minutes, she screamed. Finally, she calmed down enough to get to the car. She screamed more, but we were in the car. Finally, she calmed down and got buckled in her seat. She fell asleep on the way home, and was an angel once she got home.

Of course, while she was screaming I had other people saying what a brat she was. Little do they know what she is going through.

This, I believe, is called extinction technique. You ignore the bad behavior and praise the good behavior. If they get attention (spanking, making deals, giving in) for negative behavior. They get exactly what they want, attention. It is the catch them being good philosophy. Give them the attention when they are good. not when they are behaving bad. just 2 and a half cents!