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The 'right thing' tears at a family
Seattle Post-Intelligencer ^ | July 8, 2002 | Chris McGann

Posted on 07/09/2002 12:48:48 AM PDT by Alan Chapman

Trever Palmer, 17, says he felt nervous and slightly heroic the night he picked up the phone, dialed 911 and informed the King County Sheriff's Office that his father was growing marijuana.

Minutes later, when Aaron Palmer, a Covington computer programmer, returned home from an evening of swimming laps at the local pool, deputies arrested him. They later found more than a dozen marijuana plants growing in a hidden room in the garage and booked the single father of three into the King County Jail on drug charges.

Two months later, as Trever Palmer prepares for his last year of high school, the 140-pound wrestler is still grappling with the consequences of his actions and talked about them in an interview yesterday.

Although police lauded him for doing the right thing, he says half his relatives are mad at him. He's "found out who my friends really are" while trying to avoid Kentwood High School classmates who scorned him, calling him "a weasel" and names much worse than that.

Palmer made the 911 call largely because of a lesson he learned in a Junior ROTC ethics course: "Stand up for what you believe in, don't follow the crowd and be your own person."

He still thinks he did the right thing.

"I felt like I was saving my sister and brother from this guy," he said. "You can only put up with so much."

But his family is torn apart, and his 15-year-old sister may not see the 911 call as such a brave act.

The night her father was taken away, "she really didn't speak much to me," Palmer said. "She was crying and trying to get her stuff together."

Today, she "just kind of avoids me," he said.

Palmer said his 7-year-old brother didn't know what was going on.

Palmer, who is spending part of the summer with his grandparents in Pennsylvania, plans to live with his best friend's family until he graduates and joins the Air Force. His sister and brother are staying with a cousin. Their mother, who is divorced from their father, is unemployed and "doesn't have room for them in her apartment," Palmer said.

Palmer's sister could not be reached last night, and Palmer's father did not return phone calls. Aaron Palmer, 38, was released on $5,000 bail shortly after his arrest and pleaded not guilty last week to a felony charge of drug manufacturing, the South County Journal reported. He faces up to five years in prison.

The boy said many of his relatives can't comprehend his motives for calling police.

"It sucks," Palmer said last night. "I was really hoping that they would understand. It's kind of like that hole in (me) that needs to be filled."

He has tried to explain himself to his father's parents, who "kind of understand, but they are upset."

When he called police, he said, he wasn't considering what would happen to his family. "I kind of figured that would fall into place."

What went through his mind?

"I thought: no guts, no glory," he said.

He thought marijuana growing was taking over his father's life. Instead of spending time doing things with the family, his father tended to his plants -- moving the pots around and watering. He said that on two occasions, people visited the house on account of the marijuana.

Living around drugs is "the part that no kid should have to go through, and I didn't want (my younger brother) to go through it."

There were other conflicts. He thought his father paid attention to his sister's accomplishments, while ignoring his own. And he thought his ROTC courses, which were based on Marine Corps leadership training, put him at odds with his ex-Army father "on different military perspectives."

The "stand-up" message from his ROTC course echoed in his head.

"That set it straight, why I should do it," Palmer said. "For one thing, it's illegal."

He said another factor was the emotions stirred by reading "The Red Badge of Courage" for an English class. He said he was impressed by how a character in the book, a soldier named Nick, discovered his own bravery.

"He stood up for what he believed in," Palmer said.


TOPICS: Crime/Corruption; Culture/Society; Government; US: Washington
KEYWORDS: libertarians; wodlist
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To: ThomasJefferson
Bluntly? Many libertarian comments on threads dealing with drugs and the WOD are verbal attacks and flaming. Viewing such immaturity gets tiresome after awhile.
161 posted on 07/09/2002 12:08:27 PM PDT by KantianBurke
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To: pubmom; ThomasJefferson
Hi yourself pubmom, how are you?

This was about 15 years ago. At that time, supposedly, it was legal for a parent to give alcohol to their wards no matter if it were in public or not. I did not question my bosses word, now I wish I had.

I still do not believe in giving children alcohol or tobacco, but those are not illegal--as POT is.

I refused because it was a matter of my morals or the law. I did not agree with the law, but I could do nothing to change it, therefore I refused to compromise my morals and made someone else serve the alcohol.
162 posted on 07/09/2002 12:09:36 PM PDT by trussell
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To: ThomasJefferson
Any parent who would turn his child in to the government is beyond help.

Not to mention that the act would be a glaring admission of the parent's own pathetic failure at rasining a child.

"Help me, oh government, I can't bear to help myself".

I think these people who say they would "turn their children in" say that because they have not the guts to say, "That's it; your out of my house; here's some money; don't come back unless you change".

Pathetic.

163 posted on 07/09/2002 12:11:26 PM PDT by FreeTally
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To: trussell
I have 1 daughter and 1 son. My "children" would not be raped by large evil men.

They will if you turn them into the authorities. If your son makes a mistake and gives pot to a friend, he can go to prison and will be anally raped. I hope you don't have to face him.

If my children are worried about going to jail, then they better not break the law.

You are right, they will be better people after they spend a few years in the can. And they will rightfully hate you for the rest of their lives.

My daughter is 7 and knows how I feel about drugs. She already knows I will turn her in if she is caught with them.

Good, she will soon be old enough to hate you before it happens. I'm sure she will have a well adjusted life knowing that her mother will never stand by her if she takes a misstep. I feel so sorry for her.

There is also the option of treatment centers.

You should check in immediately. You need mental treatment.

You would condone your children or parents being active in drugs.

That is a despicable lie.

164 posted on 07/09/2002 12:11:33 PM PDT by Protagoras
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To: Alan Chapman
drug laws may be wrong but not unconstitutional?.......this is too typical of the problems with america today...the greatest act of freedom is to just do what you think is right....and if YOU think the drug laws are not right, shouldn't YOU be protesting yhem before they are misused?....there are always reasons for citizens to let eachother down in the face of governmental oppression... i guess because we can label it "conservative oppression " it is O. k,
165 posted on 07/09/2002 12:12:27 PM PDT by truefrankness
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To: Alan Chapman
drug laws may be wrong but not unconstitutional?.......this is too typical of the problems with america today...the greatest act of freedom is to just do what you think is right....and if YOU think the drug laws are not right, shouldn't YOU be protesting yhem before they are misused?....there are always reasons for citizens to let eachother down in the face of governmental oppression... i guess because we can label it "conservative oppression " it is O. k,
166 posted on 07/09/2002 12:12:29 PM PDT by truefrankness
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To: FreeTally
Pathetic.

No child should be forced by fate to have such parents. Makes you want to weep.

167 posted on 07/09/2002 12:13:28 PM PDT by Protagoras
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To: ThomasJefferson
It's fairly obvious that the kid did his own father in, for his own reasons. To all but you I guess.

IMHO, the kid chose his family, learned his values from them, and when the time came, did what was in their best interest and defended them - and too bad about those people he was living with.

168 posted on 07/09/2002 12:19:02 PM PDT by tacticalogic
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To: trussell
I refused because it was a matter of my morals or the law. I did not agree with the law, but I could do nothing to change it, therefore I refused to compromise my morals and made someone else serve the alcohol.

An applaudable stance, I must say.

Now, would you kindly see the other side. Many, many people do not agree with prohibitory drug laws, and can do nothing to change the laws. So, they refuse to compromise their morals and support laws they morally disagree with. Whether their disagreement entails not "turning someone in", vocally opposing all such laws or indulging in the prohibited products themselves, it makes no difference.

There were people who diagreed with "slavery laws", but could do nothing to change the laws. So, they had no slaves, and harbored run away slaves(a violation of the law).

Can you open your eyes and realize that "morality" is not universal, while the violation of rights is. People have many different views on the "morality" of certain laws. You refused to serve alcohol to someone because you felt it was "immoral". Others refused to turn over run away slaves for the same reason. And many, many people refuse to supprot drug prohibition in any form for the same reasons.

169 posted on 07/09/2002 12:19:46 PM PDT by FreeTally
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To: Marysecretary
RE:Oh, and where would he go? Do you know how expensive apartments are these days? Around here it's horrific!
 
My heart bleeds. I'd say there's always the roomate option, but who the hell would room with a snitch?
 
Living on your own is admirable and expensive. Maybe the child had one of those Burger King jobs where you get little money and no coverage for insurance, etc.
 
[cough sputter] - child? how in the hell is a 17 year old even remotely a child?
 
His decision wasn't an easy one. You don't know the circumstances.
 
Based on the little rats own words quoted in the article I know all I need to know. people of that ilk are to be shunned and avoided.
170 posted on 07/09/2002 12:20:34 PM PDT by tomakaze
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To: KantianBurke
Bluntly? Many libertarian comments on threads dealing with drugs and the WOD are verbal attacks and flaming.

Please show where I attacked you. My points on this thread have been addressed to so called parents who abdicate their family responsibilities to the government and advocate turning their family members in to them for not following governmenent edicts. I find people who turn on their families to be despicable.

For every attack/ flame made by one on the side of rights, I can show you at least one by people on the other side.

171 posted on 07/09/2002 12:21:18 PM PDT by Protagoras
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To: JediGirl
Much like a child who emancipates themselves from thier parents before they reach 18, hmmm?
172 posted on 07/09/2002 12:24:06 PM PDT by glory
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placemarker
173 posted on 07/09/2002 12:24:26 PM PDT by JediGirl
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To: glory
Has nothing to do with revenge--we couldn't live with eachother. It was an option better for all of us.
174 posted on 07/09/2002 12:25:54 PM PDT by JediGirl
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To: piasa
It is the father who is wrong here. If he wanted to conduct illegal business, he should have kept his secret away from his family as well so they would not have to degrade themselves to protect him.

AMEN!!!! As a former dealer, I totally agree. This guy was taking his children for granted. I think people who commit crimes in front of their children who are past the age of reason deserve everything they get.

175 posted on 07/09/2002 12:31:55 PM PDT by stands2reason
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To: ThomasJefferson
I have a different perspective than you do, Thomas. I don't know what went on in that family but I know the father was wrong in growing marijuana. It IS against the law you know. That's no example to set for your child. I've been there done that with my first husband so I think I know a little bit about this situation from first-hand experience.
176 posted on 07/09/2002 12:31:57 PM PDT by Marysecretary
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To: trussell; pubmom
I guess she won't do as I did when I "thought" I was wrong. I guess his apology thing is lost when he is wrong.
177 posted on 07/09/2002 12:32:05 PM PDT by Protagoras
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To: ThomasJefferson
I'd cut his damn throat!
178 posted on 07/09/2002 12:32:18 PM PDT by Marysecretary
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To: ThomasJefferson
All that's obvious to me is that you think it's OK to grow pot and smoke it in front of or with your kids. Sorry. I don't. No, I'm not sorry...
179 posted on 07/09/2002 12:34:12 PM PDT by Marysecretary
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To: Just another Joe
If the gov't ever made owning firearms "illegal"--then there'd be Revolution. Period.
180 posted on 07/09/2002 12:36:28 PM PDT by stands2reason
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