Confederacy Was Building Atomic Bomb... 80 Years Before WW2

Weekly World News ^ | today | some dude

[Commander8]

It comes from a tabloid source, but I wouldn't be surprised if it were true, the Old South was the cradle of American civilization.

[freebilly]

"Fat Massah...."

[BerniesFriend]

You beat me to the punch..I thought of the great TV series (movie sucked) WILD WILD WEST...this isn't the same case of the Chinese newspaper picking up the Onion.com article about Congress wanting to move to another city like a baseball team? Just curious..

[timpad]

Can't wait to read how he was going to enrich the material for fission! A modified backyard moonshine still? Or maybe with help from those aliens the WWNews keeps spotting?

Could Little Green Men have been Rebels? Did R.E. Lee receive intel from Mars? Read all about it in the Weekly World News!

[TC Rider]

This story sounds like a script from the old "Wild Wild West" TV series. I'm surprised it didn't mention the evil Dr. Loveless.

As soon as I saw the header I thought of the little Doctor.

You beat me to it.

[rwfromkansas]

That said, this report is suspicious based on the type of "serious reporting" that goes on at the Weekly World News.

[THX 1138]

Why didn't you post the story, "MAGIC PILL TURNS COUCH POTATOES INTO HUNKS & HOTTIES".

Now that's something we could have used...

[Cleburne]

And, in addition to the devious plot to destroy DC, the CSA was also developing a nuclear version of the Hunley that would deal primitive nuclear death to the major cities of the eastern seaboard. Strom Thurmond was actually one of the leading proponents of this idea, and it is rumored that the side-affects of the project have caused him to have an unusually long life-span.

[Dog Gone]

I believe it. After all, their story about the Russian oil rig that actually drilled into Hell and released a bunch of demons proved to be true.

[Conservababe]

Too many one liner comedians on this thread for me to respond further. But remember that the South had Europe as allies throughout much of the War of Northern Aggression.

[daviddennis]

Check out Saddam's Bombmaker, the fascinating true story of the people hired to make his bomb for him.

A sample episode: The French sold them a crucial atomic reactor for some 10x its actual value, and chortled when the Israelis bombed it to pieces right after the check cleared.

Saddam's bombmaker was educated in the US and gained an almost immediate love for the country. He resisted like crazy when the Iraqis ordered him back. At first, he was flattered by all the attention from Saddam and the brass. But then it started to sink in that they were seriously planning to use the silly thing ... and kill him if he didn't produce. He is now living a happy, quiet life in the United States.

It definitely gives you some pretty strong hints as to why Iraq (and other arab countries) have failed to develop an atomic bomb. Among other things, those smart enough to do it are either dead ... or escaped from the country.

D

[Jhoffa_]

Amazing..

Absolutely amazing. And I am glad he perished before perfecting it.

[The Iguana]

I hear McMullen was also working on a special Y'alltron Bomb - 30 kilotons of explosive force which killed only carpetbaggers but left all Popeye's restaurants unscathed.

[dighton]

Foolish dammyanks!
Your puny cannons are no match for our steel-encased fission bombs! The earth will be ours!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[Macklew]

Thankfully we whipped them Northern Yankee terrorist bums without the big bum.

[varina davis]

Scuse me, are you talking of the War of Northern Aggression?

I do believe that is the war he is referring to, because I don't believe there was anything "civil" about it, according to my Southern ancestors. Moreover, Southern lads had just about all they could do to get the Hunley in shape for one good foray, let alone mount an assault with atoms.

The bravery and valor of the Hunley sailors is unmatched and is a shining example of Southern spirit.

[Jhoffa_]

OH DUH..

I didn't notice the source of this nonsense.

Forget what I said and just concentrate on the page 5 girls.

[freebilly]

I hear McMullen was also working on a special Y'alltron Bomb - 30 kilotons of explosive force which killed only carpetbaggers but left all Popeye's restaurants unscathed.

Oh, you mean the Gritron bomb, made of uranium enriched Waffle House pancakes....

[Conservababe]

80 years before American scientists developed the atomic bombs dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

American scientist.....I think not! LOL