Posted on 05/27/2002 10:28:34 PM PDT by VinnyTex
Well, yes. I have almost no self-confidence...due partly to previously experienced rejections and perceived lack of interest.
I'm decent looking: not outstanding, but I pass muster. I do have social skills when I choose to use them. Oh, yes, and I'm very smart. I do have social skills, but I lack the sort of ease that self-confidence lends to such skills.
But I'm not just talking about myself. I am most familiar with my own problems attracting women, but I've also seen the successes and failures of those around me. It is by my observations of *others*, rather than myself, that I draw most of my conclusions about male-female interactions and expectations.
Tuor
No, I was perfectly serious. You sound bitter, cynical, and in great need of " dating lessons " . You also sound as though you don't know how to chat up a girl ; let alone date one. You need help.
I know a great many women who find their husband or boyfriend " handsome " , when that isn't really the case. What makes a man " handsome " , in their eyes ? The man's intelligence and how he treats them ! Few men would EVER claim that a woman is beautiful, when she is plain.
You need to first know what it is you most want in a date / mate and be realistic . Then, you need to cultivate your best qualities , learn some social graces, and go to places that the type of woman you'd like to date will probably be. If you are having problems getting women to even talk to you, your approach must stink , you don't know how to dress. and / or you are going after the wrong type of girl.
That was the easy part.
We went out on a few dates but all he wanted to talk about was football, and I know next to nothing about football. It turned out we had little in common and so nothing came of it. Hopefully, he has by now found a woman who loves football as much as he does. He was a nice enough guy though; it just turned out we weren't each other's type.
I respectfully submit that women who post on Free Republic are not typical of the general population.
On the other hand, the guy who is tops in physics, chemistry or mathematics may not get as much as a date for months, if not longer.
For the person starting that empire, though the trick is to get enough income to acquire the wealth to produce more income, etc.
Beyond seven figures, wealth can (properly invested) reach the proportion that substantial assets will survive all but the most stupid, and the underlings who manage that wealth for the family (short of being unscrupulous) will sustain the fortune in order to keep a finger or two in the pie.
Venture capital is always at risk, the greater the risk, the greater the potential for gain.
As for Getty, J Paul Getty was not one to fritter his money away, either, and somewhat renowned as a miser.
What many women want is the opportunity to wrap themselves in ostentatious symbols of wealth, while squandering much of the income that could be converted to real assets. Men are not the only ones who have bought into glamorous images presented by the modern media, or there would be neither padded bras nor breast implants.
Thankfully, after a couple of false starts I married my best friend, and she and I can accomplish darned near anything we decide to do. Similar priorities are the key to harmony, happiness, and a rich life.
Granted, this is a somewhat different place, there are no malls, and not even a MacDonalds. And we are not connected by a highway system, so the only way to get here is by plane.
The people who live here are very down to earth and not materialistic, (those types never make it here) and there are so many single women who want so badly to find somebody! I don't know how old you are, but lots of these women are in their 30s and 40s. They are nice, bright, down to earth and hard workers.
By the way, we desperately need a vet in our town if there are any out there or if anyone knows of one who wants to move to a remote but beautiful place!
Once in a while she unchains me, lets me out of the cellar and allows me to post here.
It is at those times that... She's coming, I have to go.
There seems to be some confusion on this subject because what people SETTLE for is pointed out as evidence of what they WANT.
The world is filled with "average" people, and therefore most people will settle for an "average" mate. It is supply and demand. What they desire in a mate is quite something else. They desire the most they can get.
Women, as do men, want it all. They want looks, money, power, status, adventure, to be treated as a queen, etc. They want their ego stroked too.
What they will settle for is market driven. Any woman believing that women are nobler in their selection of mates than men are, is involved in just another form of self-ego stroking.
Already done. I might be a bit bitter, but I don't see any reason to spread it around. Life goes on, Darwin or no.
Tuor
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