Careers are 'making women miserable'

Daily Telegraph ^ | April 25, 2002 | Paul Stokes

[Korth]

WOMEN have become unhappier as a result of concentrating more on their careers than the family role they once fulfilled, an academic claims in a new book.

Prof James Tooley believes the feminist revolution of the 1960s and 1970s brought about huge changes in attitudes which have not be conducive to motherhood.

In his book, The Miseducation of Women, published next month, he suggests many professional woman would have been more contented by staying at home and bringing up children.

He draws comparisons with the film character Bridget Jones, a love-hungry young woman in publishing who becomes a television presenter and craves a stable relationship rather than being left "a singleton".

Prof Tooley, professor of education policy at Newcastle University, considers that the role of housewife has been "desperately undervalued" in society.

He argues that schools should allow girls to concentrate on the arts and domestic science rather than being pushed towards subjects such as engineering and computer science in an attempt at sexual equality.

Prof Tooley, 42, who is single with no children, said yesterday: "The Bridget Jones effect is growing in society. Women find themselves successful in their careers and unhappy in their lives.

Domesticity has been degraded over the year, particularly by feminists in the 1970s who used the phrases 'parasite' and `leach' to describe the housewife.

"I expect career women will react very strongly against me and to even suggest women would be happier in the home has become almost a taboo. We need to cull a few sacred cows and start a debate on the subject. That is what I am trying to do."

He describes his book as "largely a think piece", based on a study of more than 100,000 men and women in Britain and America by the National Bureau of Economic Research.

Its findings led him to examine the way the education system was shaping the way women lead their lives.

Among his assertions are that women who were pushed into science as pupils and embarked on careers such as law and accountancy are unhappy by the time they reach 30.

Prof Tooley, from Rothbury, Northumblerland, said: "I'm not suggesting we ban girls from the labs, but my research shows that 30 per cent of young women are unhappier with their lives than previous generations were, while young men now seem happier than previous generations were."

Prof Tooley believes the "Bridget Jones generation" was spawned by the feminist revolution.

"Feminists went right to what they thought was the root of the problem. They looked at schooling to change the situation. The Sex Discrimination Act of 1975 and the introduction of the National Curriculum in 1988 are, in a way, products of that, and they've transformed what is taught in school.

"But this means that the curriculum is now designed according to the feminist idea that girls should be following the model that was set down for boys. That is, pursuing a career at the expense of all other things.

"I suggest that this is pushing girls in a direction they don't want to take and there's a whole generation of working women who don't want to be there."

[Destructor]

Women are always going to be miserable. How can you ever be happy, if you have no idea what you want out of life? How can you ever be happy, if you've deluded yourself into thinking that your life can be a Harlequin Romance novel? How can you ever be happy, if you're busy blaming men for all of your troubles?

Quote from Gary Busey in "D.C. Cab:" "Why are women so uptight? They've got half the money, and ALL the p***y!

[Harrison Bergeron]

"I do my best to make sure that we can afford to keep it that way, but if the government doesn't quit taking 1/2 my paycheck, we're gonna have to move into an RV or something!!"

Man do I hear that. And, guess what? Bush's so-called "repeal" of the Marriage Tax-Penalty only applied to working couples who file seperately. A couple filing jointly with a stay at home parent still pays a higher tax rate than a single person making the same income. The practical result is that a "stay-at-home-mom" couple subsidizes the daycare tax credits for the working couples and the working single parents.

Even the republicans endorse feminist social engineering.

Knowledge is power.

[SamAdams76]

One of us is always home when the kids get off the bus from school (it was my turn today). I don't leave for the office in the morning until the bus picks them up in the morning. So they are almost never alone. Before they were in school, we had a neighbor or family member who came over and watched them. We never had to use a daycare center. I consider myself very fortunate to have had a neighbor that we could trust to do that (and yes, we did pay her and make it worth her while).

And again, I'm not making the case that our decision is superior to just having one of us stay home and be a full-time homemaker. I'm just saying that working couples can make it work too - without being miserable.

[FITZ]

NY would be unusual then because in most places job history is more important than a degree from 20 years ago. In my field much from 20 years ago is obsolete.

[wardaddy]

I'm sorry dude....I hope at least your wife is "validated".....that's the key here. Women who don't have to work do so in order to be validated. It's an ego thing....pretty self obsessed in my view....especially if toddlers are in the home.

Men...at least responsible ones....work because they know they have to....and they don't expect laurels for it.

[wardaddy]

dh???.....donor husband???...just kidding....that's the nomenclature in fertility lingo...really.

[wardaddy]

Men do it less homegirl....with all due respect....grovel grovel.

[wardaddy]

Would you be kind enuff to marry and support my little brother..please!!

[wardaddy]

Yes honey....I am a sexist...no doubt about it. I would need a 144 step program to even begin to scratch the surface of my entrenched sexist ways. I am in other words beyond help. I like it that way.

[wardaddy]

Babies and small children need a good mommy at home during the day more than a good daddy. I for one would never allow myself to be dependent on a woman...unless she was an heiress perhaps and we could both hang out parenting and whatnot in our south of France chateau digs courtesy of her grandaddy's hard work.

[wardaddy]

Sounds like Busey ad-libbed that one.

[wardaddy]

You gotta change that username dude!

[Rainmist]

By the time I quit work 5 years ago, I believe I was on the verge of a breakdown. The constant running to get here and there, keep up with housework, husband, children, and animals and running on minimal sleep just about did me in. I have to admit that it was hard at first being a SAHM, harder than ANY job I've ever had. But now, 5 years later, I wouldn't have it any other way. My kids are happy, healthy and bright. We get to do a lot of things together and I can attend every school party and/or event. If they ever get sick at school and need to come home, I'm only a phone call away. There is plenty of time later for me to work if I want, but my kids are only kids for a short while. My hubby and I plan to make the most of it.

[cajungirl]

I just posted a reply on the wrong thread!! Women whine when miserable. Men tend to passive agress{forgetting, not putting out the garbage, dropping clothes on floor, etc.} or they have a tendancy to draw blood,,shoot, stab, beat up. So while women make alot more noise, men just cannot beat us at verbally droning on and on, men are alot more lethal. Careers make men as miserable as they make women,,So should all men stay at home. Nah. I have done both and prefer staying at home but have a tendancy to go to pot when I do, lying around in a chenille bathrobe, eating chocolate, complaining and getting fat.

[cajungirl]

Well, I haven't done a study with statistics and probabilities and control groups. I am of an age that I have observed alot in my life and in my career. I see men who are miserable in jobs, hate them, would love nothing better than to leave work as they know it and take it out on wives, underlings, other drivers, etc. They regularly die off earlier, have earlier and worse heart disease, higher blood pressure, etc. I don't think all men are like this but my guess is the majority would just as soon shove their jobs but cannot. Women have a different set of problems but the depressed, angry, housewife who stays at home is not the norm but is a significant number. And happy career women abound as well as happy housewives. I don't think one person's decision ought to be another. My daughter who is a professional stayed home after her kids were born, she hadn't decided to do that but a healthy maternal instinct told her to and I supported her. When they are older, I would support her working. I did parttime for a long time and then full time after they left for college. Never regretted it a minute. I do admit to an antipathy for day care.

[bourbon]

Hey, man, I go to school with 'that girl' and about 150 other girls just like her. A sizable majority of the female law/med. students I know have fallen prey to the illusion that they can "have it all." The process of unlearning this foolishness and internalizing the hard truth is going to be extremely painful for these ladies and whomever they choose to date/marry.

[MEGoody]

Nice article, but for those women whose husbands don't pick up their fair share, it is very difficult.

[MEGoody]

LOL Regulated by the government. That is cute. But have you noticed how men are taking on many of these 'feminine' characteristics.