September 16, 2002
Elton for sale
BELIEVE it or not, Elton John's new best friend is Edmond Safra's widow, Lily Safra. The two are so close, John has even agreed to grant a personal meeting and photo-op to the winners of an upcoming raffle - something he has never done before because of "security concerns." The Sept. 24 raffle at the Di Modolo jewelry store on Madison Avenue benefits Safra's pet charity which educates gifted, disadvantaged Israelis. One insider said, "He has never done anything like this - and only Lily or Princess Di could have made him."
Rather than create an original song for Dianna's death, Elton John pulled the rug out from under Marilyn Monroe.
It was easier to flip the sheet music over and scrawl a new lyric on the back--a matter of minutes: worth millions.
Now, out of the closet and out of talent, the formerly creative John is just another john for the vary-married widow.
A boy toy in her employ--
Elton, be careful, be very careful--
Those closest to your patroness have a habit of dying under suspicious circumstances.
Better pencil your requiem now, and put it in a safe place.
And it seems to me you live your life
Like a panhandler in the wind
Never failing with your hand out
When the bills come in
And your redactions will always fall here
Along England's greenest palms
Your talent's burned out long before
Your conscience feels its qualms
How nice to spend someone else's money on needy students--
While grinding under heel an innocent father whose mother struggles to feed their three children.
We remain unimpressed by philanthropy with suspicious windfall, and a chorus line of sycophants.
Is this rich, or what??
And *Lily* just seems to know *who* to attach herself & with what cause that'll give her an automatic "In,", too.
Oh this one's clever, alright.
& Mud??
This one's for you, ol' buddy; a parody for a parody writer! (~Frankly I'm as suprised as anyone learning of Phil's hidden talents, nonetheless here ya go...)
"And it seems to me you live your life
Like a panhandler in the wind
Never failing with your hand out
When the bills come in
And your redactions will always fall here
Along England's greenest palms
Your talent's burned out long before
Your conscience feels its qualms"
BWAHAAA!!!
Perfecto-mundo!!
Yes, Sir Elton John may now join the ranks of such noted celebrities as Whitney Houston, Michael Jackson, Debby Gibson, Paula Abdul & a host of others lost in the awsome venturi effect of the circular garbage can of life.
That is: IF, Sir John lives long enough to find & then get in line?
The plot thickens.
On behalf of Ted Maher...
-BTTT-
MONACO, FREE TED MAHER NOW!!!!!