Nope, sorry, you're WRONG. It did not upset me, and you didn't really read what I said. For starters, that particular scenario has never happened to me, nor is it likely to. My wife cheated on me, multiple times, and in so doing killed the love I felt for her. I married with no expectations of divorcing, because I took those vows seriously. When she managed to kill the love, I was the one who said "enough, I won't live this way any longer. I will not be made a fool of, I will not be the object of others' scorn or pity. I want out." She was neither fat, nor was she pumping out children, nor had she "cut me off". I do not hate sex, I love sex. I have had sexual partners after the divorce, but none recently. You say you like sex. Great, I would love to find a woman that loves sex, too. I don't have a problem with sex, or with women. What I have a problem with is finding a woman who has her head screwed on straight, and isn't a man-hater, who understand what a vow is and doesn't promise things she has no intention of delivering. I'm looking for a woman who realizes it isn't always going to be sweetness and light, that there will be difficulties, but two people committed to each other and to their relationship can work out those things better than one person alone.
I haven't channeled my sexual energies into bitterness. I'm just really tired of your constant focus on the physical, in terms of sex, looks, etc. as though that was all there is to marriage, or to a relationship. You seem to think that people cheat on their mates for reasons sexual, or reasons having to do with how they look. That's the shallowness I'm talking about. I won't deny that those reasons sometimes come into play, but that is an indication of the shallowness of the individuals. Relationships are complex, and each one is unique in the problems and trials faced by the partners. Those problems can't always be solved by a good f**k, as much as you'd like to think they can be, whether inside or outside the relationship. People grow apart. Sometimes the ties that bound people together at first unravel, due to neglect, or to other reasons. It isn't always sexual. One of the things that sets us above animals is the fact that we can resist and redirect our basic instincts when following those instincts would cause harm to others. To exercise control over our basic urges, our sexual urges, is not denial of them, it is saying that we will control them, rather than being controlled by them. You do not raise yourself to a higher level by refusing to exercise control over the lower level.
I know that most of what I have said will go right in one ear and out the other, because, being young, you are CERTAIN that you have greater understanding than your elders...that is the basic folly of youth. Whoever said that youth was wasted on the young was a genius. Doesn't matter whether you agree with me or not. I'm not even saying that I consider myself an expert on the subject. You've expressed your opinion. I've expressed mine. Neither one cancels out the other. You see the older ones here as having hang-ups and phobias, because you can't graps what we're saying. We have reasons for what we say, and experiences to back it up. You don't.