German penises 'too small for EU condoms'
http://www.FreeRepublic.com/forum/a3b5e54bd0ea7.htmNews
Keywords: EU,SOCIALISM
Source: Ananova Published: 24th July 2001
Posted by Zadokite
Germany has demanded a rethink on EU guidelines on condom size after finding its average penis did not measure up. Doctors around Essen were ordered by the government's health department to check out the average size suggested by Brussels. They reported the EU has overestimated the size of the average penis by almost 20% and insist other countries will discover the same.
Urologist Gunther Hagler, head of the team compiling the research, said: "By checking hundreds of patients we found German penises were too small for standard EU condoms. "On average they were 14.48 cms long and 3.95 cms wide. That makes them much smaller than the EU standard condom size of 17 cms in length and 5.6 cms in width."
He denied the German man was any smaller than the rest of Europe, adding: "We think the EU has got its sums wrong, and if other countries were to check out their men's assets they would find the EU has made a mistake in its calculations.
"There should be a rethink and the EU statisticians should check their figures again. After all, they have also ruled EU standard condoms should be able to hold 18 litres of fluid without breaking, which also seems a bit excessive."
Posted by Zadokite
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Blind man sparks gun permit debate
Source: Lansing State Journal
Published: 18 October 2001 Author: staff
Posted by 45Auto
David Gordon believes he meets all the requirements to be granted a Michigan concealed weapons permit, even if he is blind. The Portage man is over the age of 21, he has completed a gun-safety course and doesn't have a criminal record or history of mental illness.
Gordon's application for a concealed weapons permit in Kalamazoo County has touched off debate over the rights of the blind to carry guns. Michigan's law does not specifically exclude people with disabilities or include any shooting accuracy requirements. Gordon said he is not an activist for gun rights, but he has been mugged twice - once at gunpoint - and knew a blind man who was beaten in the late 1980s.
"I've been in situations where I've experienced fear. I have the right to protect myself if I'm in danger," said Gordon, 52, who has been certified by a veteran gun instructor.
County gun board members are expected to consider Gordon's application on Oct. 24. "On the surface of it, I think it's highly unlikely Gordon will receive a permit," said gun board Chairman Phillip Reames, a firearms instructor.
Reames said Gordon would probably fall under a section of the law denying permits to those considered a danger to themselves or others. The gun board plans to discuss the application with Gordon. Gun rights advocates say Gordon deserves to be treated like anyone else.
But Joy Livingston, president of the Southwest Michigan Million Mom March/Brady Campaign, argued it's an issue of public safety overriding individual rights.
But Joy Livingston, Idiot president of the Southwest Michigan Million Mom March/Brady Campaign, argued it's an issue of public safety overriding individual rights.
Wrong, as usual. Of course, that's what the bastids would like to see; arbitrary laws that cite ANY reason to override the 2nd for everyone. I can see some irony in this if Mr. Gordon sues over not getting his permit and using the libs Americans with Disabilities Act to cite "prejudice" against the handicapped!
posted by 45Auto
Russian President Putin called President George W. Bush with an emergency:
"Our largest condom factory has exploded," the Russian President cried. "My people's favorite form of birth control. This is a true disaster!"
"Mr. Putin, the American people would be happy to do anything within their power to help you,"replied the President.
"I do need your help" said Putin. "Could you possibly send 1,000,000 condoms ASAP to tide us over?"
"Why certainly! I'll get right on it,"said Bush.
"Oh, and one more small favor, please?" said Putin. "Yes?"
"Could the condoms be red in color and at least 10" long and 4" in diameter?" said Putin.
"No problem," replied the President.
Mr. Putin hung up and started laughing with his aides about how those stupid Americans will fall for anything.
George hung up and called the President of a condom company. "I need a favor, you've got to send 1,000,000 condoms right away over to Russia."
"Consider it done," said the president of the condom company.
"Great! Now listen, they have to be red in color, 10" long and 4" wide."
"Easily done. Anything else?"
"Yeah," said the President, "print 'MADE IN AMERICA, SIZE SMALL' on each one!"