List of "Tired" Christmas Music (That Should Be Retired)

Self (Vanity)

[SamAdams76]

The Christmas season is upon us once again and the sounds of holiday music can be heard in shopping malls, restaurants, and other public places. Radio stations are already slipping the occasional Christmas song into their playlists and by mid-December, it will be wall-to-wall Christmas music.

Now that is not a bad thing. I like Christmas music. I collect Christmas music. Later in the Christmas season, I will post a vanity on my favorite Christmas music and that post promises to be much longer than this one.

But why is it that so many tired and really annoying Christmas songs seem to get the most airplay? Is it just me or does it seem like the radio stations play the same few Christmas songs 90% of the time?

On this thread, I will list some of my least favorite or more accurately, the most tired Christmas songs of alltime and will seek your input. I put a lot of thought into putting this list together. You are welcome to disagree with me and/or list a few really tired Christmas songs of your own.

Surely there are worse Christmas songs out there than the ones I am about to list. But I kept my list to songs that are familiar and that get a lot of airplay. The emphasis here on on "tired" rather than "bad." Also, to make my list, the song must have been out for at least five years. These songs have established some longevity of being really tired. I am listing the ones that have been "in our face" year after year. Without so much great material out there (I'll have a separate post on that closer to Christmas), there is no excuse for radio stations not to pursue fresher material.

So in no particular order, here goes...the most "tired" Christmas songs of alltime.

• Elmo & Patsy - Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer. Now I'm not normally a violent person. But if somebody was to shoot the person who wrote this song, it would be okay by me. This has got to be absolutely the most annoying Christmas Song I have ever heard. It stopped being funny sometime around 1984. Yet year after year, radio stations seem to play it at least once every hour. Many a Christmas compilation album has been ruined for me by the inclusion of this tired ditty.
  

• Adam Sandler - The Chanukah Song. Okay, maybe it was funny the first 232 times I heard it. But this song has really run its course and it should be retired. And to add insult to injury, Sandler released a "sequel" version of this song a few years ago but it already seems like 20 years ago. It's just not "funakah" to hear this anymore.
  

• The Waitresses - Christmas Wrapping. Many, many years ago, back when Ronald Reagan used to refer to Russia as the "Evil Empire," it was cool to play this record at Christmas. It was cutting edge and having this song in your Christmas collection separated you from the Perry Como and Bing Crosby crowd. Well it's not cutting edge, cool or "New Wave" anymore. It's as mainstream as Garth Brooks and as dull as Peter Jennings. Give this record a rest, please.
  

• Jose Feliciano - Feliz Navidad. Must be a "PC" thing because the song itself is lame. Okay, okay, so it's politically correct to be "diverse" and know "Merry Christmas" in 17 different languages. So Buon Natale to you then, I am putting a contract out on this record. I am going to have it inserted into a block of wet cement and send it to the bottom of Boston Harbor. At least the Italians know what to do when something becomes tired and no longer "useful." Time for some new Christmas material from Mexico, and fast.
  

• Cheech & Chong - Santa And His Old Lady. Cheech: "Like I PLAYED with that dude, man." Chong: "Whoa, like Santa Claus ain't no musician, man!" Cheech: "I'm hip, man, like that dude couldn't play for beans, man!" Well I'm hip to Cheech & Chong. They can't play for beans and they aren't funny anymore to boot. Were these guys EVER funny? Must have been a 70s thing.
  

• Band-Aid - Do They Know It's Christmas? Not only was this song a blatant rip-off of "We Are The World" (or maybe it was vice versa) but the question the song poses is ridiculous. Of course they don't know it's Christmas, and they probably couldn't give a shit either. Until this year, did we ever know it was Ramadan over there? And that "Feed The World" chorus, well, here it is 15 years later and the people are still starving over there. Guess it makes liberals feel good to sing the song though. Like the next one on my list...
  

• John & Yoko - Happy Xmas (War Is Over). Maybe it's the spelling of Christmas that irks me most about this record. Didn't this song start the whole loathsome "Xmas" thing? Anyway, you can be sure that this song will get even heavier airplay this Christmas season in light of the current war situation. But I'm so tired of this song already!
  

• Bruce Springsteen - Santa Claus Is Coming To Town. Okay, I like Bruce Springsteen. But I still think he could have picked a better Christmas song to cover. Or even have done an original. Anyway, I was already tired of this song by 1979.

I could think of a few more but I'm going to let my fellow Freepers get a crack at adding to the list of "tired" Christmas music.

[SamAdams76]

I do indeed know of Trans-Siberian Orchestra and have both their Christmas albums. The style of music reminds me of Meatloaf, but they are so much better. With each listen, the music grows on you. Great liner notes too. My pet peeve with many albums is the lack of liner notes. If the music industry doesn't want us downloading off Napster, give us some meat to go with the packaging! Make it worthwhile to get the album and great liner notes and cover art help do that.

BTW, TSO has a third album out called "Beethoven's Last Night." It's not a Christmas album but I recommend it.

[bleudevil]

I don't dislike "Feliz Navidad" because of the Spanish lyrics, but because it's annoying and repetitive.

I'm very sentimentally attached to the Christmas LPs from my childhood - Lawrence Welk, The Voices of Walter Schumann, New Christy Minstrels, etc. (Guess I'm showing my age. :->) They are a blend of spiritual and secular that I love.

Here are some selections:

"Go Tell it on the Mountain"

"Christmas in Killarney"

"Fum, Fum, Fum" (hard to understand the words, but the chorus is "fum, fum, fum"

"I Wanna Do More Than Whistle (Under the Mistletoe)" Silly but cute!

[bleudevil]

A few years ago, a drug/alcohol dryout center used "I'll Be Home for Christmas" in a commercial. It played over scences of Mom and the kids home making cookies, with Mom sending worried glances at the clock. The the scene flashed to drunken Dad stumbling around on a dark street, dropping the car keys ... as someone crooned "you can count on meeee."

Talk about a guilt trip! It made me want to either run down to the center and sign up, or throw something through the screen.

[strictlyaminorleaguer]

Actually, that's one that I'll never be able to listen to without a tear in my eye; it makes me think of my dad and uncles away from home at Christmas during WWII.

One hated Christmas song I didn't nominate last time around is "We Need A Little Christmas" and anything else that smacks of Muzak.

Someone above mentioned albums they're attached to from childhood; mine are a couple of Great Songs of Christmas albums produced by Columbia Records for Goodyear (!). Favorites on those include the Mormon Tabernacle Choir's Carol of the Bells, Julie Andrews' Silent Night, Eileen Farrell's O Little Town of Bethlehem, and a profoundly moving violin solo of Ave Maria (Schubert) by Isaac Stern. Wish these albums could be rereleased on CD.

[Jhensy]

a really good Santa Claus parody of Black Sabbath's "Iron Man" with lyrics like "I AM SANTA CLAUS!"

YES! That's from some Christmas parody album from about 8 or 9 years ago. My brother and I were browsing in a record store and they were playing it over the PA, it cracked us up. There was also a version of "Oh Christmas Tree" played by chainsaws, and I believe there was also "Bring Me the Head of Santa Claus". I always regret not buying it that day. Anyone out there know about this LP?

[NovemberCharlie]

Go Tell It On The Mountain is the only song from the list I recognize, but I like that one.

[bleudevil]

I think I have the same album! I have heard that there is a computer procedure to convert vinyl LPs to compact discs with a CD burner. Somehow you hook up a turntable to the CD burner, or something. A friend of mine supposedly has the equipment to do so. I've got the old Chirstmas albums out, ready to take to his house.

[strictlyaminorleaguer]

Cool! If there's a way to do it, I'd love to get those on CD. My brother taped the albums for me several years ago, and they're among my prized possessions. Still, I worry about these tapes breaking one of these days, so it's good to know there are alternatives. Maybe I should petition Goodyear too. Thanks from a fellow Cincinnati chili fan (go Muskies!).