“My fellow Americans. Today I speak to you on the ongoing crisis in...in...you know, the thing...Afghanistan. They gave me a map and a globe at Camp David this weekend and I found out that Afghanistan is right next to Pakistan! And also Turkmenistan. Lots of Stans in that part of the world, haha. But anyway, I got on the phone and called that Taliban leader and told him if you burn down our embassy, you’re not getting the billion dollars. Forget it! And we’re going to have an orderly evacuation, not like that Saigon thing under a previous GOP administration. If a couple of desperate people want to hang on to our military jets, that’s their problem. Too bad. Come on, man! People need to get in line and wait their turn!
So here’s the deal. We’re ready to work with the Taliban. The Republicans aren’t, they’re beholden to Trump. We’re taking the high ground here! So on that note, enjoy the rest of your August vacations before the kids have to go back to school all masked up. Get vaccinated, and if necessary get additional boosters. We’re all in this together!”
There will be a Live Thread here when Pedo Joe does address the nation.
I’m going to propose a drinking game. Every time Xoe Biden blames Trump - take a drink.
And see if we all don’t get blotto in 5 minutes.