A...People who slip on ice/snow often fall on their backside and it hurts.
B...People mentioned in this article like to live on Brokeback Mountain.
C...Slipping on the ice/snow and falling on your backside, especially after a long night of Brokeback Mountain, hurts even more.
A = C. We must spend more government money to solve this. /s
Maybe the butt-plugs are being driven home when they hit the sidewalk.