I agree with you. When you let them define and then use their narrative, you lose.
I also agree. A week ago, nobody had ever heard of this term. I'm guessing Hillary's team sat in a room somewhere and brainstormed ideas for a new label to use against Hillary's political opponents, and came up with this. I'm thinking that Hillary is using the race card now because she's scared to death that the black community just might start thinking Trump has a point when he talks about the way Democrats have played blacks for fools over the years.