Google Awarded Patent For Glue-Covered, Pedestrian-Catching Car Hood

One Newspage ^

[SMGFan]

Google has patented a glue-covered car hood that catches pedestrians hit by cars and holds them in place.

When a pedestrian is struck by a moving vehicle it isn’t just the impact that does harm.

Victims run the risk of getting bounced off of the hood and into other dangerous objects and perilous situations. As a means of preventing the latter scenario, Google has patented a glue-covered car hood that catches the unfortunate individual and holds them in place.

[SMGFan]

What else will get stuck to the car? /s

"I'm walking here! I'm walking here!" Ratso Rizzo

[samtheman]

This is big in the what-could-go-wrong category.

[VanShuyten]

Ambulance-chasers have trunks full of neck braces.

[samtheman]

Not just ambulance chasers. Did you see Better Call Saul?

How easy to just fall on a car and have your friend video you stuck and struggling on the hood, with the video starting conveniently after the fall.

[mylife]

Googlue?

[Fresh Wind]

Is Google worried about their self-driving cars running amok?

Or is this preparatory for Soylent Green harvesting?

[SamAdams76]

That’s a great idea. Next time I hit a pedestrian I don’t even have to stop. I can just re-route GPS to the nearest hospital, have the emergency room guys peel him off my hood and I can continue on my way.

[spokeshave]

..as well as an assortment of dogs, cats, moose, spotted owl and monarch butterflies.......did you say road debris...?

[Diogenesis]

Of course they did.

The new Patent Commissioner is
a GOOGLE lawyer installed to give Google anything
they want.

So a better question is: Who did they steal the idea from?

[fruser1]

So what keeps dirt, bugs, bird doo, etc., from sticking to it?

You get to tradeoff a car that’s 100% guaranteed to be a mess for the fractional chance you hit somebody.

Another example of modern decision making.

[silverleaf]

Imagine cleaning the bugs and poo offa that

[silverleaf]

Rofl!

[Vendome]

[oldasrocks]

This is how to make a 12 passenger car out of a Yugo.

[aviator]

A solution to a babysitting problem....

[TangoLimaSierra]

Not one of you read the article, did you?

[Kirkwood]

Thanks Google!

[Yardstick]

They need to complete the thought and come up with a scoop or suction device that removes the pedestrian from the car at the hospital. No fuss, no muss.

[mumblypeg]

Dunk Hillary in that glue. Maybe some of the charges will stick.

[Bryanw92]

Does Google live in an insect-free part of the country?