You’re correct. To me it’s every bit as impossible to understand as Michael Jackson clearly resenting the fact that he was born a handsome black man.
Wasn’t he brought up in a Jehovah Witness household?
https://www.google.com/search?q=Jehovah+Witness+michael+jackson&rls=com.microsoft:en-US:IE-Address&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&sourceid=ie7&rlz=1I7ADRA_enUS475&gws_rd=ssl